A sannyasi is forbidden not to talk even in private place with woman. But a householder, he, if he associates woman under marriage tie, then it is religious. And without this, this is irreligious. And that religious sex life is God

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"a sannyasi is forbidden not to talk even in private place with woman. But a householder, he, if he associates woman under marriage tie, then it is religious. And without this, this is irreligious. And that religious sex life is God"

Lectures

Bhagavad-gita As It Is Lectures

A sannyāsī is forbidden not to talk even in private place with woman. But a householder, he, if he associates woman under marriage tie, then it is religious. And without this, this is irreligious. And that religious sex life is God. Religious sex life is God. This should be followed.
Lecture on BG 7.8-14 -- New York, October 2, 1966:

Buddhir buddhimatām asmi tejas tejasvinām aham. One who is very influential, that influence is Kṛṣṇa. That influence, that particular influence of a particular man, that is also Kṛṣṇa. Balaṁ balavatāṁ cāham. And one is very strong, stout and strong, that particular strength is also Kṛṣṇa. Just like an elephant is very strong. And more than elephant, the gorilla is still more strong. That strength, wherefrom..., wherefrom he gets strength? Now, suppose I am a human being. I cannot get such strength by my own endeavor, but I can get strength ten thousand times more than the elephant if Kṛṣṇa favors. Therefore strength. Just like Bhīma. Bhīma had strength ten thousand times than an elephant. He was so strong. There is no question of not believing. Because as I find that you are stronger than me and he is stronger than you, oh, similarly, there are many degrees of strength. Now, these degrees of strength is Kṛṣṇa. So you can understand Kṛṣṇa. Without Kṛṣṇa's favor, nobody can be stronger than the others. So balaṁ balavatām asmi.

Kāma-rāga-vivarjitam. Kāma. Kāma means desire. Rāga-vivarjitam, without attraction. Desire without attraction, that is Kṛṣṇa. Desire without attraction, how it can be possible? Desire with attraction. Whenever we desire something... I want some young girl, I desire. Desire means I have got attraction. But desire without attraction, how it is possible? Can you explain? Yes. Desire without attraction means Kṛṣṇa consciousness. I desire for Kṛṣṇa's benefit, not for my benefit. That is desire without attraction. So kāma-rāga-vivarjitam.

Kāma-rāga-vivarjitam, dharmāviruddho bhūteṣu kāmo 'smi bharatarṣabha. "And lust, lust which is not against religious principles, that is also I am." What is that lust? Lust means, generally means, sex, sex life. Sex life which is not against religious principles, that is Kṛṣṇa. How it is religious principle, sex life? Yes. Sex life is religious principle in this way, that when you want a good child, in that sense, if you undertake sex life, that is sanctioned. That is religion. And without that, everything sex life is nonreligion. If you can produce a good child, you can have thousand times sexual intercourse, but if you produce cats and dogs, don't take. That is irreligious. So here it is stated that dharmāviruddho bhūteṣu. Therefore, for sex life, dharma is marriage. In the human society there is marriage. In the animal society there is no marriage. They indulge in sex life any way, because they are animals. But in human society, either Hindu society or Muslim society or Christian society or any society, any civilized society, there is the marriage. So the marriage, sex life by marriage, is religious, and sex life without marriage, that is irreligious. So here Kṛṣṇa says that "Sex life," dharmāviruddhaḥ, "which is not against religious principle, that is I am."

So there is no harm to become a householder. It is not that... I am a sannyāsī; I have given up household life. And one person who is a householder... There is no difference, provided it is on the principle of religion. I am a sannyāsī. I am forbidden to make any association with women. I cannot talk even with woman in a lonely place. That is forbidden. I cannot talk with a woman. I give you one practical example. When my Guru Mahārāja, my spiritual master, was living... I am speaking about fifty years before. We were all young men at that time, and one of my Godbrothers, he was also young man, Dr. O. B. Kapoor, and his wife was also young. So his wife wanted to speak with my Guru Mahārāja. My Guru Mahārāja was at that time not less than sixty or more than that, and the girl, my friend's wife, she was not more than twenty-two years. But actually, she was just like his granddaughter. But she proposed, "Sir, I wanted to speak with you something confidentially." My Guru Mahārāja said, "Oh, no, no. I cannot speak with you confidentially. You can speak whatever you like here." Just see. "I cannot speak." Now the so much age difference, so much, I mean to say, affection, still, he refused: "No, no. I cannot talk with you confidentially because you are woman."

So a sannyāsī is forbidden not to talk even in private place with woman. But a householder, he, if he associates woman under marriage tie, then it is religious. And without this, this is irreligious. And that religious sex life is God. Religious sex life is God. This should be followed. If we, every one of us reading Bhagavad-gītā, every one of us, at least... So far India is concerned, that is a different thing. In America also, I find so many American gentlemen, they read Bhagavad-gītā. But I am afraid if they are reading Bhagavad-gītā so scrutinizingly, as it is stated here, dharmāviruddho bhūteṣu kāmo 'smi bharatarṣabha: "Sex life which is not against religious principle, that is I am." So in, I mean to say, regulated sex life, married life, that is Kṛṣṇa. So that is not without Kṛṣṇa. That is Kṛṣṇa.

Then He says,

ye caiva sāttvikā bhāvā
rājasās tāmasāś ca ye
matta eveti tān viddhi
na tv ahaṁ teṣu te mayi

Now, one may question, "Then if You are particularly—You are Personality of Godhead, Supreme God—You are speaking that You are sound, You are this light, You are this praṇava, You are bīja, You are also kāma, so many things. So do You mean to say that You are simply in goodness? And what about the other things?" Because there are three qualities of the material world: the modes of goodness and the modes of passion and the modes of darkness. Now, so far Kṛṣṇa has described Himself, that any good thing... Just like sex life in marriage is a good. "That's all right. You are. What about other things?" Then Kṛṣṇa replies. He automatically says that ye caiva sāttvikā bhāvā rājasās tāmasāś ca ye.