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Sex urge (Letters)

Correspondence

1967 Correspondence

The whole world, beginning with the highest planet to the lowest in this material world is facing this problem. Combination of husband and wife is a necessary satisfaction of the sex urge.
Letter to Gargamuni -- Calcutta 13 November, 1967: You have written to say that your wife and you have a problem on which you require my help. The whole world, beginning with the highest planet to the lowest in this material world is facing this problem. Combination of husband and wife is a necessary satisfaction of the sex urge. The foolish people see everyday this problematic situation, still they are not intelligent enough to avoid it. Training of brahmacari life is especially meant for this purpose, and a student is advised not to indulge in sex life just to avoid these problems. It is very difficult to satisfy a woman by a person who has no good income, neither very good health. The woman as a class wants sufficient means to eat, and decorate and at the same time full satisfaction of sex. Any husband who cannot satisfy his wife by these three items, namely sufficient food, sufficient dress and ornament, and sufficient satisfaction of sex, must meet all these problems. And as soon as one becomes engaged in solving these problems it is very difficult to make any progress in Krishna Consciousness. If one is serious to make any success in the matter of Krishna Consciousness, one should avoid the association of woman as far as possible. Married life is a sort of license to the incapable man who cannot avoid sex life. On this statement, you can understand your real position. I do not agree with your wife's statement that New York is unfit for human habitation. A real Krishna Conscious person can adjust things nicely even in hell. A fully Krishna Conscious person is always in transcendental position and he is not afraid of any place which is so called, unfit for human habitation. A Krishna Conscious person is always satisfied whether in Vaikuntha or in hell. His satisfaction is not the particular place but his sincere service attitude towards Krishna. I have no objections if your wife and you go to San Francisco and live there peacefully as man and wife concentrating your attention for Krishna Consciousness. Hope you are well
From Srimad-Bhagavatam we know that the opposite sex namely the female members of Vaikuntha are many many times more beautiful than they are in the heavenly planets. Their hips and attractive smiles cannot stimulate sex urge passion of the man or male devotees.
Letter to Brahmananda -- San Francisco 21 December, 1967: Regarding Damodara's plight, we are very sorry but we must always expect that some of the weak soldiers may fall down in a fight waged against the great Maya external energy of Krishna. The sex attraction is very great in the material world. But in the spiritual world it is different. From Srimad-Bhagavatam we know that the opposite sex namely the female members of Vaikuntha are many many times more beautiful than they are in the heavenly planets. Their hips and attractive smiles cannot stimulate sex urge passion of the man or male devotees. In the Vaikuntha planets the opulence is very great and yet they are all engaged in the transcendental loving service of the Lord. It is very difficult to conquer over the influence of Maya, but who firmly fixed up in Krishna Conciousness cannot be a victim of Maya. Anyway, we cannot stop our fighting with Maya, neither we can expect that all our soldiers will remain unhurt.

1968 Correspondence

If Jagatananda is feeling sex urge so urgently even at the age of 16 or 17, he must be prepared to take the responsibility of married life.
Letter to Brahmananda -- Los Angeles 21 January, 1968: Feeling of sex life in young boys and girls is quite natural, but one has to check such sex life by reason, argument, and knowledge. The married boys and girls are there—in our society sex life is not forbidden. If Jagatananda is feeling sex urge so urgently even at the age of 16 or 17, he must be prepared to take the responsibility of married life. When I was in India, Gargamuni wrote me plainly like that, and I at once allowed him to get married. Now I see that the boy and girl, Gargamuni and Karunamayi, are living happily. So if Jagatananda is after that nice girl Lilasukha, he must arrange for marrying her. Otherwise where is the solution? I cannot allow in our society any nonsense like illicit sex life at any circumstance. Jagatananda must subdue his sex desire by constant chanting of Hare Krishna, and praying to Krishna to help him. If not he must be prepared to marry and take the responsibility fully. As his elder brother you will please instruct him of my desire.
If they are strong enough in Krishna Consciousness any amount of sex urge will not disturb them. Even it disturbs, it will come and go.
Letter to Brahmananda -- Los Angeles 21 January, 1968: Actually the association of young boys and girls is very much disruptive for Brahmacari life, but in your country it is impossible to stop free mixing of young boys and girls. So voluntarily they have to check these sex desires until they are married. If they are strong enough in Krishna Consciousness any amount of sex urge will not disturb them. Even it disturbs, it will come and go, Krishna is Madan Mohan, or the Enchanter of Cupid. And Cupid is the god of sex desire. So if anyone wants to enchant Cupid, instead of being enchanted by Cupid, he must take shelter of the Enchanter of Cupid, Sri Krishna.
In the material world sex urge is the binding force for material existence. A determined person tolerates such sex urges as one tolerates the itching sensation of eczema. If not one can satisfy the sex urge by legitimate marriage.
Letter to Satsvarupa -- Los Angeles 22 January, 1968: I understand that sometimes you feel sex urges and frustration. In the material world sex urge is the binding force for material existence. A determined person tolerates such sex urges as one tolerates the itching sensation of eczema. If not one can satisfy the sex urge by legitimate marriage. Immoral sex life and spiritual advancement are incompatible proposition. Your full engagement in K.C. & constant chanting will save you from all inconveniences. You have accepted me as father, so I have also accepted you as my dear and real son. Relationship of father & son on spiritual platform is real and eternal, on the material platform such relationship is ephemeral and temporary. Although I cannot give you anything as father, still I can pray to Krishna for your more & more advancement in K.C. Your sincerity & service mood will always help you in advancing your genuine cause.
Letter to Hayagriva -- Los Angeles 8 November, 1968: The Deity worship must be continued by everyone. Another secret of success is that when one is very much sexually disturbed he should think of Lord Krishna's pastimes with the Gopis, and he will forget his sex urge. To think of Krishna's pastimes with Gopis, but not to try to imitate.

1969 Correspondence

Sex urge is a symptom of every living entity, but in the Srimad-Bhagavatam it is advised that it is something like the itching propensity. If one can tolerate this itching, he can save himself from enormous troublesome business resulting from this itching sensation.
Letter to Madhudvisa -- New Vrindaban 10 June, 1969: Sex urge is a symptom of every living entity, but in the Srimad-Bhagavatam it is advised that it is something like the itching propensity. If one can tolerate this itching, he can save himself from enormous troublesome business resulting from this itching sensation. So an intelligent person rather suffers the pain of itching sensation than accepting the after effects of satisfying the itch. In India, therefore, there are many akanda brahmacaris, and my Guru Maharaja was the best brahmacari. So your decision to remain a brahmacari is very glorious, and if you you stick to the principles of Krishna Consciousness rigidly, you will never be disturbed by any sex urge, and life will be very much simplified, completely being engaged in Krishna Consciousness.
Regarding your marriage, that is my open opinion that if anyone can remain a brahmacari all the time, without being disturbed by sex urge or who can tolerate such urges, there is not any need for him to marry and take some extra responsibilities.
Letter to Gopala Krsna -- London 26 November, 1969: Regarding your marriage, that is my open opinion that if anyone can remain a brahmacari all the time, without being disturbed by sex urge or who can tolerate such urges, there is not any need for him to marry and take some extra responsibilities. But one who is disturbed in mind, he must get himself married. Therefore, it has to be decided by oneself if he should marry or not marry. It is a fact however that if one is thoroughly engaged in Krishna's service, this sex urge does not have much disturbance. But you have got to work outside with karmis and different types of people. Under the circumstances, if you have a good wife to help you, that will be very nice. Another difficulty is that in modern civilization everyone is independent spirited. The girls are no longer very much humble and submissive to their husbands. So you must be prepared to tolerate such whims of your future wife. According to our Vedic civilization, disagreements between husband and wife is not taken very seriously. But the modern age allows divorce even, either by the husband or by the wife. These things are not good. But after marrying, certainly there will be some disagreement or misunderstanding between husband and wife. So consider all these points, and you can decide yourself. But if you marry, I have no objection, as I have gotten married so many boys and girls and they are living peacefully.

1972 Correspondence

Beyond thinking are feeling and willing, so even thoughts of sex connection may come, that is difficult even for saintly persons to avoid, still, in the further stages of feeling and willing we can easily conquer over this sex urge.
Letter to Kirtiraja -- Mayapur 28 February, 1972: Regarding your question about thinking about sex, is that also one form of illicit sex or against our four principles? Yes, even thinking sex is the same as illicit sex, but one who is not advanced cannot avoid it. But that does not disturb our regular procedure. We should strongly follow all the regulations and principles and chant and these thoughts will come and go away. Thinking will come; even great saintly persons like Lord Siva are not free of thoughts that come, so what to speak of you. So we must say that such thinking is no offense because you are accustomed to this habit. But beyond thinking are feeling and willing, so even thoughts of sex connection may come, that is difficult even for saintly persons to avoid, still, in the further stages of feeling and willing we can easily conquer over this sex urge. Willing should be avoided and acting stopped, or else there is offense of breaking this basic prohibition of illicit sex-life. Because thinking comes I shall give it practical shape: that is nonsense, but because it is an old habit we are unable to check it unless we can understand the nature of feeling, willing and then action, and how by proper use of intelligence and prevent thoughts which must come from maturing into actions—that is the practical application of Krishna Consciousness regulative principles.
Because the sex-urge is so strong in young persons, and because they are used to mixing freely with one another, I encourage my students to get themselves married. But our point is not that hard knot.
Letter to Mr. Loy -- Vrindaban 7 November, 1972: Because the sex-urge is so strong in young persons, and because they are used to mixing freely with one another, I encourage my students to get themselves married. But our point is not that hard knot as above described. It is simply a relationship of mutually helping each other, man and wife, to make advancement in spiritual life, nothing more. We are not after home, money, fame, like that. But that does not mean that he shall not support her nicely, no. It is the duty of husband to protect wife in every way from the onslaught of material nature, and he must act always as her spiritual guide by being perfect example of devotee. Women are not so quick to learn, and they are weak by nature, so they should be protected in this way.
So far your difficulty for controlling the sex urge, my advice in that connection is that the more you become Krsna conscious, that sex urge can be checked. That is the only way for checking the sex urge.
Letter to Sankarasana -- Bombay 31 December, 1972: So far your difficulty for controlling the sex urge, my advice in that connection is that the more you become Krsna conscious, that sex urge can be checked. That is the only way for checking the sex urge. First thing is, you have made promise when you took initiation that there will be no illicit sex connection. If still you are unable to fulfill that promise to your spiritual master, then what is the use of calling yourself devotee and disciple? That is simply pretending. So you should think like this, that I have promised my spiritual master this, now I must obey him without any exception, otherwise I have no business calling myself his disciple. That will be your austerity or tapasya for forcing you to make very rapid advancement in Krsna conscious understanding. Without tapasya there is no question of making advancement. So if still the material nature is so much attractive to you that you are unable to sacrifice things in this way, then better you give up the whole thing and do as you like outside. But if you want to call yourself devotee and serve Krsna in that capacity, then you must avoid these four basic principle restrictions under all circumstances, without any exceptions. Of course once, twice, Krsna may excuse, that is not very difficult, but more than that it will become very difficult for Krsna to excuse you and there is great risk that everything will be lost despite all of your time and effort spent.

1977 Correspondence

Letter to Brisakapi -- Bhuvanesvara 19 January, 1977: Go on chanting Hare Krsna and immediately Krsna will help you. Sex indulgence is not good; it is grossly material and we have to surpass it. But when one has staunch faith in Krsna, he'll be able to transcend the urge. Now you will be able to chastise your sex dictation. You are determined, so Krsna will help you.
Page Title:Sex urge (Letters)
Compiler:Visnu Murti, Kanupriya
Created:25 of Nov, 2008
Totals by Section:BG=0, SB=0, CC=0, OB=0, Lec=0, Con=0, Let=12
No. of Quotes:12