Courtesy

Expressions researched:
"courtesy"

SB Canto 1

SB 1.7.42, Translation and Purport:

Śrī Sūta Gosvāmī said: Draupadī then saw Aśvatthāmā, who was bound with ropes like an animal and silent for having enacted the most inglorious murder. Due to her female nature, and due to her being naturally good and well-behaved, she showed him due respects as a brāhmaṇa.

Aśvatthāmā was condemned by the Lord Himself, and he was treated by Arjuna just like a culprit, not like the son of a brāhmaṇa or teacher. But when he was brought before Śrīmatī Draupadī, she, although begrieved for the murder of her sons, and although the murderer was present before her, could not withdraw the due respect generally offered to a brāhmaṇa or to the son of a brāhmaṇa. This is due to her mild nature as a woman. Women as a class are no better than boys, and therefore they have no discriminatory power like that of a man. Aśvatthāmā proved himself to be an unworthy son of Droṇācārya or of a brāhmaṇa, and for this reason he was condemned by the greatest authority, Lord Śrī Kṛṣṇa, and yet a mild woman could not withdraw her natural courtesy for a brāhmaṇa.

Even to date, in a Hindu family a woman shows proper respect to the brāhmaṇa caste, however fallen and heinous a brahma-bandhu may be. But the men have begun to protest against brahma-bandhus who are born in families of good brāhmaṇas but by action are less than śūdras.

The specific word used in this śloka is vāma-svabhāvā, "mild and gentle by nature." A good man or woman accepts anything very easily, but a man of average intelligence does not do so. But, anyway, we should not give up our reason and discriminatory power just to be gentle. One must have good discriminatory power to judge a thing on its merit. We should not follow the mild nature of a woman and thereby accept that which is not genuine. Aśvatthāmā may be respected by a good-natured woman, but that does not mean that he is as good as a genuine brāhmaṇa.

Bhagavad-gita As It Is Lectures

Lecture on BG 13.1-2 -- Bombay, December 29, 1972:

And if you utilize this body according to the śāstra to purify it... Because human body is meant for purification. Yasmāt śuddhyet sattvam. That is the given, instruction given by Ṛṣabhadeva. Tapo divyaṁ putrakā yasmāt śuddhyet sattvaṁ yena śuddhyet sattvaṁ yasmād brahma-saukhyam anantam. Nāyaṁ deho deha-bhājāṁ nṛloke kaṣṭān kāmān arhati viḍ-bhujāṁ ye (SB 5.5.1). He advised instructed his sons: "My dear sons, don't use this body like the hogs and dogs. Whole day and night searching after stool. Eating, for eating. don't use this." And, after eating, as soon as there is the sex is strong, then sex life. That is hogs life. We have seen. These are the examples. Nature's. They are very stout and strong, fatty, eating stool. And as soon as fatty, immediately sex life, without any discrimination, mother, sister, or anyone. That is hogs. You see from nature's example. Dogs and hogs. The dog has no, I mean to say, courtesy or shame. At, in the street, they're having sex life.

1973 Conversations and Morning Walks

Room Conversation with Two Buddhist Monks -- July 12, 1973, London:

Prabhupāda: So far hospitality is concerned, according to Vedic culture, Indian homes were open for everyone, even for the enemies. Gṛhe śatrum api prāptaṁ viśvastam akutobhayam. If one gets an enemy at his home as guest, he should receive him in such a way that the man would forget about his enmity with him. Gṛhe śatrum api prāptaṁ viśvastam akutobhayam. So these are preliminary human behavior. Even without any understanding of spiritual values, they are expected to behave nicely.

Buddhist Monk (1): Yes. It is very easy to love someone who loves you. But real purified, selfless love is to radiate it without any discrimination, both to the person who loves and to...

Prabhupāda: Yes, therefore I said...

Buddhist Monk (1): ...whom does not love you. That is the beginning...

Prabhupāda: Therefore I said.

Buddhist Monk (1): ...of that good hospitality. That's real hospitality.

Prabhupāda: Yes, that is... That I said, Gṛhe śatrum api prāptam. Even one gets an enemy, he should be also be received.

Buddhist Monk (1): He's come to your place and treat him with all the respect and courtesy...

Prabhupāda: Yes.

Room Conversation with Mister Popworth and E. F. Schumacher -- July 26, 1973, London:

Popworth: I found this the other day, and you'll forgive me making this point, but when I was in discussion, it was impossible for me to make a point without being interrupted so frequently that I failed to make my point at all. Now, can I beg for courtesy for our guest to listen to what he has to say. Then answer him.

Revatīnandana: But... Just that this is interesting, that the solution is there...

Schumacher: But you haven't heard the problem yet.

Revatīnandana: But the problem is that people cannot understand the solution. They cannot understand.

Prabhupāda: But one thing...

Revatīnandana: Why they cannot understand?

Prabhupāda: Mister, yes... I forgot your name.

Popworth: John.

Prabhupāda: John, Mr. John. That we follow strictly the Vedic injunctions, and unless we become God conscious, there cannot be any reformation in this world.

1977 Conversations and Morning Walks

Room Conversation -- April 13, 1977, Bombay:

Prabhupāda: But first of all we must know also what is the position. If we also become enamored by the so-called scientists, politicians, philosophers, then we cannot preach. We must definitely be convinced that they're all rascals. As a gentleman, I can give him some respect. That is another thing. But he's a rascal. You must know that "I am talking with a rascal number one." So I... He cannot deviate me from my position. But I can talk in a nice way, gentlemanly. That is another thing. That is courtesy. But I know that these rascals, number fools, number one fools, they have no idea. Caitanya Mahāprabhu therefore said, ei rūpe brahmāṇḍa bhramite kona bhāgyavān jīva (CC Madhya 19.151). In this way they are rotting within this universe. Kabhu svarge kabhu martye narake ḍubāya. Sometimes by puṇya they are in the higher planetary system, some powerful lokas(?). Sometimes fish, sometimes demigod, sometimes dog and cat. This is going on. Kṛṣṇa says. Nivartante mṛtyu-saṁsāra-vartmani (BG 9.3). Mṛtyu-saṁsāra-vartmani, botheration. Then there is... We have got this... Any intelligent person gets the Bhagavad-gītā.

Morning Conversation -- April 30, 1977, Bombay:

Prabhupāda: You can... One who... Don't.

Tamāla Kṛṣṇa: Prabhupāda said, "Don't ask Swami..."(?)

Gopāla Kṛṣṇa: Not... He shouldn't...

Tamāla Kṛṣṇa: No. What good is he going to do? Prabhupāda should tell him.

Prabhupāda: Don't become impertinent. Then he will say something. They'll he'll spoil the whole thing.

Gopāla Kṛṣṇa: Yes. He wrote to him from England. So I'll write to him.

Prabhupāda: Don't make much correspondence. It is courtesy he has replied. That's all.

Tamāla Kṛṣṇa: Actually we read in the newspapers that he gets 8,700 letters a day.

Prabhupāda: The Morarji?

Room Conversation -- October 2, 1977, Vrndavana:

Prabhupāda: Because they have introduced this train. Twenty-four hours this Deluxe train is running.

Tamāla Kṛṣṇa: There's a train that's even faster, called the Rajdhani. Seventeen hours.

Brahmānanda: Also there was air strike. So people who would normally take airplane, they're taking train.

Tamāla Kṛṣṇa: Girirāja made one life member aboard the train, a very nice gentleman living on Marine Drive, quite wealthy. He says he never takes the train, only flies. But he went to the airport at four o'clock, and the airport said, "We have no flights. All flights cancelled." They didn't even give the courtesy to call up the people to tell them the flight was cancelled, although they had the telephone numbers of the ticket purchasers. So the man had to take the train.

Prabhupāda: The strike instrument invented by modern civilization, so dangerous.

1968 Correspondence

Letter to Gurudasa -- Los Angeles 14 December, 1968:

The thing is, what for you will contact this Vinode Vani dasi?* What kind of help do you want from them? They are already not cooperating. The history of this Vani dasi is that she is an old lady, and has a house and has hung a sign, Gaudiya Math, but that is all. So make clear to me exactly what sort of help you want to get from her, and I will advise you duly. In the meantime, you can one day make a courtesy visit to her, and see what is the situation with her, if her place can be used for our purposes.

1972 Correspondence

Letter to Amogha -- Madras 15 February, 1972:

He complains that you and others of our devotees in Malaysia have somehow or other caused some disturbance in the girl's family, especially Hanuman, and has requested me to ask you to not interfere in the matter anymore. Now I do not do not know what are the details, but you may inform me. We must be very careful to avoid anything scandalous in our dealings, and always keep to the highest standards of respect and courtesy. So kindly deal with such matters in future with great caution and tactfully so that our Movement may not get a bad reputation, especially among people who are very sensitive to such things.

1976 Correspondence

Letter to Bhagavan -- New York 14 July, 1976:

Concerning the proposed meeting with the Pope, I have no objection cancelling or delaying the journey to Tehran if the meeting with the Pope is assured. That is important. But if it is simply a courtesy visit, then what is the use? If he is prepared to discuss seriously how religion is becoming degraded all over the world, then it is worthwhile. Religion is now being taken as a formality. People generally have no real conception of God. Ours is a tangible connection with God. We know who is God and how to serve Him. Everything is fact.