Bride (Lectures, Conv and Letters)

Expressions researched:
"bride" |"bride's" |"brides"

Bhagavad-gita As It Is Lectures

Lecture on BG 1.16-19 -- London, July 16, 1973:

In the beginning Sañjaya informed Dhṛtarāṣṭra that Duryodhana rājā. So actually the fight is between the two kings. One side Duryodhana, another side Yudhiṣṭhira. One may not misunderstand, therefore particularly mentioned kuntī-putra, this rājā is Kuntī's son, kuntī-putra. So Drupada, Mahārāja Drupada, the father of Draupadī, Draupadī was gained by Arjuna in competition. Draupadī, the daughter of Mahārāja Drupada is Draupadī. She is Draupadī. And her sons they are draupadeya.

So the grandfather, the grandsons, all of them were present, because they were allies. Mahārāja Drupada happened to be the father-in-law of the Pāṇḍavas. Draupadī accepted five husbands. When Draupadī was gained in the competition, they were incognito. The Pāṇḍavas were incognito. They were banished for twelve years, and after twelve years, one year they had to live incognito. Nobody would understand where they are living. So they took shelter at the house of Mahārāja Virāṭa.

So Virāṭa, at that time this Mahārāja Virāṭa's daughter Uttarā, was trained by Arjuna for dancing. Arjuna was appointed as a dancing teacher for the daughter of Mahārāja Virāṭa, Uttarā. So when it was discovered that Arjuna was not a dancing teacher, he was the great hero, Mahārāja Virāṭa wanted to offer his daughter, that you marry my daughter, because he was disclosed. So Arjuna said, "How can I marry this girl. I am her teacher. Therefore a teacher is to be considered as father, so it is not possible. So if you like I can get this girl married with my son Saubhadra, Subhadrā's son."

Arjuna had another wife Subhadrā. That Subhadrā, you know, sister of Kṛṣṇa. Sister of Kṛṣṇa. So Subhadrā, Balarāma, elder brother, Kṛṣṇa, younger brother. Kṛṣṇa wanted to hand over Subhadrā to Arjuna, and Balarāma wanted to hand over Subhadrā to Duryodhana. So Kṛṣṇa could not say anything. The elder brother has decided. Therefore Kṛṣṇa advised Arjuna to kidnap Subhadrā. Just see how much Kṛṣṇa was affectionate to Arjuna that Arjuna liked also to marry Subhadrā, and Subhadrā also liked, but the elder brother did not agree. So they made a plan that Arjuna kidnap Subhadrā.

This kidnapping was allowed among the kṣatriyas, and fight. That is kṣatriya marriage. Unless there is fight, that marriage is not complete. The red vermillion which we apply, that is kṣatriya principle. After killing the opposite party, the blood will be smeared over the hair of the bride. That is conquer, victory. So in every marriage, Kṛṣṇa had 16,108 wives, and each wife was married by fighting, beginning from Rukmiṇī. Rukmiṇī also, the first wife of Kṛṣṇa, the first queen, when Kṛṣṇa became king of Dvārakā, she was the first queen. So Subhadra was kidnapped by Arjuna. Rukmiṇī was settled up to be married with Śiśupāla. Śiśupāla also happened to be Kṛṣṇa's cousin-brother, and Rukmiṇī did not like that she would be handed over to Śiśupāla. She wanted to marry Kṛṣṇa. So she sent one letter to Kṛṣṇa that this is the position. "My brother Rukma, he has decided to hand over to me to Śiśupāla, but I don't like. So please arrange for kidnapping."

Lecture on BG 2.7-11 -- New York, March 2, 1966:

Now, the idea of accepting spiritual master, that is also very obligatory. You see? As soon as you accept one as the spiritual master. First of all, we have recorded in your... You have heard it, that acceptance of spiritual master must be selected, you see, after careful examination, just like one selects his bride or bridegroom after careful examination. And in India they are very careful because the marriage of the boys and girls take place under the guidance of the parents. So the parents very carefully see. So similarly, if one has to... The acceptance of spiritual master is necessary. According to Vedic injunction, one, everyone, should have a spiritual master.

Srimad-Bhagavatam Lectures

Lecture on SB 1.3.27 -- Los Angeles, October 2, 1972:

So these families, dynasties, are very, very old. Every... According to Vedic system, any family—brāhmaṇa, kṣatriya, vaiśya, those who are higher caste—they must give at least seven generations account. Otherwise he is not a respectable family. Seven generations. His father, his father, his father, his father, his father, like that. When there is marriage, then there is check corroboration. The bride's party and the bridegrooms party, they should narrate their seventh generation. If within their seventh generation it, what is called, collide, becomes the one man, then there will be no marriage, because it becomes the same family. One cannot marry in the same family. He must pick up another family. Otherwise one could marry his own sister. No. That is not possible.

Lecture on SB 1.5.15 -- New Vrindaban, June 19, 1969:

Then Vyāsadeva says, Nārada Muni says, tataḥ karuṇārthe vibhu anātmanaḥ deha-vimāna athaiva guṇaiḥ satyādibhiḥ pravartamānasya guṇair janasya darśaya bhavān iti.(?) "Therefore you write literature in such a way that people will become attracted to Kṛṣṇa, or the Supreme Lord." Simply official understanding of Kṛṣṇa—"God is great" or "Kṛṣṇa is all-powerful"—but my attention is only how to improve my material condition... So this picture was given in our Back to Godhead. Perhaps you all remember that a bridegroom party was to go to the bride's home. In India the marriage party, bridegroom party, the bride, his father, his relatives, go with the bride, bridegroom, to the bride's home, and the marriage ceremony takes place there in the presence of all kinds of relatives. That is the system. So the marriage was to take place in a different village some miles away, and in Bengal the land is full of rivers. The rivers are considered to be high roads. So it was settled that the bridegroom's party will start in the evening before the marriage day and reach there in the morning and rest whole day, and in the evening the marriage will take place.

Lecture on SB 1.16.19 -- Hawaii, January 15, 1974:

Now, this is śāstra. Five thousand years ago, what was written, that is now becoming true. Now there is no marriage as it was taking formerly, Vedic marriage. The father (and) mother will select the bride, bridegroom, and there will be gorgeous ceremony and marriage. The father will spend... Both parties, the girl's father and the boy's father, will spend. Still in India, there are cases like that. They'll spend their hard-earned money during the marriage ceremony of their son and daughter. But in this age, gradually, it is said, svīkāra eva codvāhe. Udvāha means marriage, taking the charge of the girl. The boy takes charge of the young girl from the custody of her father. This is marriage. Woman, according to Vedic civilization, they are not recommended freedom. They should be taken care just like children are taken care of. You cannot give independence to the children. That is not possible. Then it is not good for them. Similarly, woman also should be taken care of. They should not be given freedom. That is not good for them. They should be protected by the father in childhood, by the husband in youthhood, and by the grown-up children in old age. Three stages. But in this age, women are trying to take independence of father, husband or children. That is not good. That is described in the śāstra.

Lecture on SB 3.26.8 -- Bombay, December 20, 1974:

But in Bengal this is the practice. When the son goes to marry to the bride's house, it is a custom. The mother asks the son, "My dear son, where you are going?" So the bridegroom answers, "I am going to bring one maidservant for you." This is the system.

Lecture on SB 5.5.8 -- Vrndavana, October 30, 1976:

When you are married in India, there is some band party, and the bride, bridegroom is decorated like king, and he is on the horseback and is taken.

Initiation Lectures

Initiation Lecture and Bhagavan dasa's Marriage Ceremony -- New Vrindaban, June 4, 1969:

this marriage ceremony is not for sense gratification. We should always remember. It is helping one another. The husband will help the wife, the wife will help the husband, so that both of them become advanced in Kṛṣṇa consciousness and make their human life perfect. So there is no question of divorce. There is no question of separation. Because divorce, separation, these are meant for sense gratification. As soon as there is some lack of sense gratification, there is immediately divorce or separation. No. Here there is no such question. So our, this new bride and bridegroom should always remember that in any condition of life they should remain together. And that will be possible if they concentrate their ideas to Kṛṣṇa consciousness. Then it will be possible. Otherwise māyā will attack in so many ways and cause disruption in so many ways. So our... We are taking part in this marriage ceremony not like ordinary marriage. It is for making progress in Kṛṣṇa consciousness. You should always remember that this marriage has no separation, no divorce. Lifetime.

Initiations -- Sydney, April 2, 1972:

Prabhupāda: Yes. Thank you very much. That's all. Now you change. And you instruct them. First of all... First of all, accept that, that "I take charge of..." Why do you forget? So why don't you do that? I tell you. (yelling) So why don't you do it? Do it.

Devotee: Do you, Raghunātha dāsa, do you take Gaurāṅgī devī to be your bride, to protect her, to help her advance in Kṛṣṇa consciousness, and promise that there shall never be...

Deity Installation and Initiation -- Melbourne, April 6, 1972:

So your name is Devadarśana dāsī, "who can see all the demigods." Right hand. (japa) Give them garland. After initiation they'll exchange it. Give them. Give them on the... Yes. On their neck. You can sit down here. Where is that red powder? Get some. You sit there. He sits here. After changing garlands they will change place and the bride will give the powder and cover her head. No, the bride, bridegroom, yes. Come on. Come on.

Wedding Ceremonies

Paramananda & Satyabhama's Wedding -- Montreal, July 22, 1968:

I am a sannyāsī. I have renounced my family life. I have got my children, my grandchildren, I have my wife still living, but I have separated from them. This is called sannyāsa. Why I am taking interest again, this family life of my students? Because I want to see them properly progress towards spiritual life. Therefore, although it is not the business of a sannyāsī to take part in marriage ceremony, in this country, just to save my students, both boys and girls, from sinful activities, I am personally taking interest that they may become good gentleman and lady by marriage. So I am very happy that those boys and girls who have agreed, and they are now married and getting children, and they are feeling very happy. Many of them are present in this meeting. From their face, from their activities, it appears that they are very happy. So in this Kṛṣṇa consciousness society we have got this program that if some boy or girl wants to get married, I help. So this marriage ceremony is today arranged on that principle. But the present bride and bridegroom must know it certainly that this marriage is not for sense gratification. This marriage is for purification of life. So there is no question of divorce. There is no question of separation. So don't get into married life if you have got such propensity.

Paramananda & Satyabhama's Wedding -- Montreal, July 22, 1968:

The necessities of this life is, because we have got this material body, we must eat, we must sleep, we must defend, and we must mate. These are the demands of this body. But they should be so regulated in Kṛṣṇa consciousness that it will not be disturbing element, but we shall make progress further and further towards spiritual realization of Kṛṣṇa consciousness. Therefore, not only the new bride and bridegroom, I request every one of my students who are present that this... The aim of married life is to produce nice children, Kṛṣṇa conscious children. That is the best service to the human society: produce nice children.

Wedding Ceremony and Lecture -- Boston, May 6, 1969:

Prabhupāda: Hare Kṛṣṇa. So this is very simple method: chant, dance, eat nicely, and realize God. First of all give to the audience, then... (devotees chanting japa) Why don't you collect something, door? Right side bride, left side bridegroom.

Jāhnavā: Right side bride. (wedding fire sacrifice begins)

Prabhupāda: Yes. That's all right.

1969 Conversations and Morning Walks

Lord Caitanya Play Told to Tamala Krsna -- August 4, 1969, Los Angeles:

Tamāla Kṛṣṇa: Maybe we will show Lord Caitanya's marriage? Is that nice to show?

Prabhupāda: Yes. Marriage. Yes, that is nice. The Indian system, marriage, is that the bridegroom goes to the house of the bride with procession, band, nicely decorated. They'll go... And He'll be married with first Lakṣmīpriyā, the first wife. There will be fireworks in the marriage ceremony. Yes.

1976 Conversations and Morning Walks

Morning Walk -- February 9, 1976, Mayapura:

Prabhupāda: Yes. And his wife, my mother-in-law, was seven years. Dr. Rajendra Prasada, the president, he was married when he was eight years old.

Tamāla Kṛṣṇa: (laughing) How old was his wife?

Prabhupāda: He was sleeping. The marriage party goes to the bride's house. So it was to be... The time fixed was at twelve o'clock or one o'clock. So the bridegroom was sleeping. So all the men made: "Oh, get up! Get up! You have to be married! Now you get up! Get up! Get up!"

Tamāla Kṛṣṇa: He didn't understand.

Prabhupāda: He did not know what is marriage. "Get up! Get up! You have to be married now."

Room Conversation with Life Member, Mr. Malhotra -- December 22, 1976, Poona:

Prabhupāda: They say it will be a unique temple in Bombay. (break)

Mr. Malhotra: My son is getting married on 24th of January. The younger son who went to factory this morning. He is getting married. And we are going, taking bride from here to Juhu. There is Hotel Horizon there, near Kṛṣṇa Land. So the bride will be staying there in Horizon, and then from there procession will be going to Sun and Sand, so on 24th. Whether you will be in Bombay or not? 24th January?

Prabhupāda: May not. Because Kumbha-mela is there.

Room Conversation -- December 26, 1976, Bombay:

Prabhupāda: Oh, Sriram is a famous man.

Indian man: No, not that millionaire. Another Sriram. And they were from Delhi. Just I'm talking only about 1939-40. In Karachi he came. He said every boy, before marriage, his marriage, he was supposed to go and take training from a prostitute for a month or so.

Prabhupāda: Ācchā.

Indian man: If a boy was not trained there he could not find a good wife.

Prabhupāda: Ācchā.

Indian man: That was a part of his qualification to get a good wife.

Prabhupāda: Now how is this (indistinct) because the bride and bridegroom is selected by the parents.

Indian man: Yes, the parents would not select that boy.

Prabhupāda: Oh.

1977 Conversations and Morning Walks

Room Conversation -- October 6, 1977, Vrndavana:

Kulādri: Made by devotees, yes. The box is also made by devotees. This is onyx from your palace with gold trim. This they have also made. This is a medallion made with sapphire and rubies on gold. The devotees have also made this. Here's some rubies and emeralds and opals.

Prabhupāda: So, why don't you find out some bride? (laughter)

Room Conversation -- October 13, 1977, Vrndavana:

Prabhupāda: There is a story. A bridegroom was selected. So, the other party, bride's party, they inquired how the bridegroom was quite qualified. So they said, "He's a doctor." Then they inquired, "What kind of doctor? Doctor of philosophy, doctor of medicine or...?"

1967 Correspondence

Letter to Brahmananda -- Vrindaban 4 August, 1967:

I have already instructed you that Gargamuni should get married. They should get a marriage certificate as soon as is possible. In the temple the ceremony should be observed by chanting Hare Krishna before the fire, offering the clarified butter with the word Saha, and the bride and groom should exchange their garlands before the Lord Krishna deity and promise not to be separated in life. They should know it that bodily relation between the husband and wife is secondary; primary factor is that both should help one another in the matter of advancement of K.C.

Letter to Brahmananda -- Vrindaban 22 August, 1967:

Regarding Gargamuni's marriage, I have already sanctioned it. Perhaps you did not receive the letters containing all instructions. I repeat: the bride and groom should sit before the Deity Lord Krishna or Jagannatha and you should ignite the fire to offer clarified butter; simply chant Hare Krishna, all of you, and offer the butter to the fire with the word SAHA. The bride and groom should exchange their garlands, and the groom should promise never to forsake his wife, and the wife should promise to serve the husband for all her days. Then when there is opportunity, I shall further bless them personally.

1968 Correspondence

Letter to Brahmananda -- Seattle 16 October, 1968:

I think also that Gargamuni also should be supplied with another bride. Because karmis without association of woman, cannot work. So as he is going to be a karmi—not exactly karmi, karma-yogi, so if he likes, he can marry again. But he cannot be a very strict husband, otherwise the same thing will happen. Because in America, the girls are not so trained that they will be very much obedient. So you think over, but if he likes, he can marry again.