Bad son

Expressions researched:
"bad child" |"bad children" |"bad son" |"bad sons" |"son became bad" |"son has gone bad" |"son may be bad"

SB Canto 4

SB 4.13.21, Translation and Purport:

Vidura inquired from the sage Maitreya: My dear brāhmaṇa, King Aṅga was very gentle. He had high character and was a saintly personality and lover of brahminical culture. How is it that such a great soul got a bad son like Vena, because of whom he became indifferent to his kingdom and left it?

In family life a man is supposed to live happily with father, mother, wife and children, but sometimes, under certain conditions, a father, mother, child or wife becomes an enemy. It is said by Cāṇakya Paṇḍita that a father is an enemy when he is too much in debt, a mother is an enemy if she marries for a second time, a wife is an enemy when she is very beautiful, and a son is an enemy when he is a foolish rascal. In this way, when a family member becomes an enemy it is very difficult to live in family life or remain a householder. Generally such situations occur in the material world. Therefore according to Vedic culture one has to take leave of his family members just after his fiftieth year so that the balance of his life may be completely devoted in search of Kṛṣṇa consciousness.

SB 4.13.39, Purport:

According to smṛti-śāstra, a child generally follows the principles of his maternal uncle's house. Narāṇāṁ mātula-karma means that a child generally follows the qualities of his maternal family. If the maternal family is very corrupt or sinful, the child, even though born of a good father, becomes a victim of the maternal family. According to Vedic civilization, therefore, before the marriage takes place an account is taken of both the boy's and girl's families. If according to astrological calculation the combination is perfect, then marriage takes place. Sometimes, however, there is a mistake, and family life becomes frustrating.

It appears that King Aṅga did not get a very good wife in Sunīthā because she was the daughter of death personified. Sometimes the Lord arranges an unfortunate wife for His devotee so that gradually, due to family circumstances, the devotee becomes detached from his wife and home and makes progress in devotional life. It appears that by the arrangement of the Supreme Personality of Godhead, King Aṅga, although a pious devotee, got an unfortunate wife like Sunīthā and later on a bad child like Vena. But the result was that he got complete freedom from the entanglement of family life and left home to go back to Godhead.

SB 4.13.43, Translation:

The King thought to himself: Persons who have no son are certainly fortunate. They must have worshiped the Lord in their previous lives so that they would not have to suffer the unbearable unhappiness caused by a bad son.

SB 4.13.44, Purport:

It is said that a married couple must have a son, otherwise their family life is void. But a son born without good qualities is as good as a blind eye. A blind eye has no use for seeing, but it is simply unbearably painful. The King therefore thought himself very unfortunate to have such a bad son.

SB 4.13.46, Translation:

Then the King thought: A bad son is better than a good son because a good son creates an attachment for home, whereas a bad son does not. A bad son creates a hellish home from which an intelligent man naturally becomes very easily detached.

SB 4.13.46, Purport:

The King began to think in terms of attachment and detachment from one's material home. According to Prahlāda Mahārāja, the material home is compared to a blind well. If a man falls down into a blind well, it is very difficult to get out of it and begin life again. Prahlāda Mahārāja has advised that one give up this blind well of home life as soon as possible and go to the forest to take shelter of the Supreme Personality of Godhead. According to Vedic civilization, this giving up of home by vānaprastha and sannyāsa is compulsory. But people are so attached to their homes that even up to the point of death they do not like to retire from home life. King Aṅga, therefore, thinking in terms of detachment, accepted his bad son as a good impetus for detachment from home life. He therefore considered his bad son his friend since he was helping him become detached from his home. Ultimately one has to learn how to detach oneself from attachment to material life; therefore, if a bad son, by his bad behavior, helps a householder to go away from home, it is a boon.

SB Canto 9

SB 9.16.33, Translation:

When requested by their father to accept Śunaḥśepha as the eldest son, the elder fifty of the Madhucchandās, the sons of Viśvāmitra, did not agree. Therefore Viśvāmitra, being angry, cursed them. "May all of you bad sons become mlecchas," he said, "being opposed to the principles of Vedic culture."

SB Cantos 10.14 to 12 (Translations Only)

SB 10.49.4, Translation:

He remained in Hastināpura for several months to scrutinize the conduct of the weak-willed King, who had bad sons and who was inclined to give in to the whims of mischievous advisers.

SB 11.22.42, Translation:

Because the mind, which is the resting place of the senses, has created the identification with a new body, the threefold material variety of high, middle and low class appears as if present within the reality of the soul. Thus the self creates external and internal duality, just as a man might give birth to a bad son.

Srimad-Bhagavatam Lectures

Lecture on SB 1.8.34 -- Mayapur, October 14, 1974:

So this big, big lump of matter, earthly planet, they are actually not heavy, but it becomes heavier when there are demons. Demons means material activities. If there is spiritual activity, it remains very light. And if there is too much material activity and materialistic persons, it become heavier and troublesome. So such time became possible, and therefore the earthly planet went to Brahmā to appeal to Viṣṇu to take His incarnation. So somebody says that bhārāvatāra..., tāraṇāya, avatāraṇāya, to diminish the burden, burden... Just like a bad son is a burden of the father. This has been explained by Cāṇakya Paṇḍita that a stupid son... Ko 'rthaḥ putreṇa jātena yo na vidvān na bhaktimān: "What is the use of getting a son who is neither learned nor a devotee? Useless." Ko 'rthaḥ putreṇa jātena: "Such kind of son, what is the use?" The son who is not a devotee... Two things are required: the son should be a devotee or a learned. Without being learned, nobody can become devotee. If one becomes devotee, he's learned also. But sometimes materially learned, not devotee, it happens. So if one is neither learned nor devotee, what is the use of such son? The example is given: kāṇena cakṣuṣā kiṁvā cakṣuḥ pīḍaiva kevalam: "If you have got one eye, cataract, you cannot see, but it is always troublesome." Unless you get it operated, it is simply troublesome. In many places it is said, Cāṇakya Paṇḍita... Ko 'rthaḥ putreṇa jātena. Varam eko guṇī putro na ca mūrkha-śatair api: "If you get one son, very qualified, that is preferred. What is the use of having many sons and all of them are rascals and fools?" Na ca mūrkha-śatair api.

So as a father becomes perplexed when there are rascal sons, similarly, when there are increase of rascal population the world becomes overburdened. Therefore it is called... It is said in the Bhagavad-gītā, varṇa-saṅkara. Varṇa-saṅkara. Now the whole world is practically full of varṇa-saṅkara. First of all, there is no division of varṇas. Cātur-varṇyaṁ mayā sṛṣṭaṁ guṇa-karma-vibhāgaśaḥ (BG 4.13). According to quality, it can be done.

Lecture on SB 1.8.43 -- Mayapura, October 23, 1974:

So what is the answer?" The answer is, "My dear Arjuna, both you and Me, we take so many incarnations, but you forget. But I do not forget. I do not forget." Therefore Arjuna is always with Kṛṣṇa. It is not that in this age, this millennium, Arjuna is friend of Kṛṣṇa. No. He is eternal friend. He has made friendship with Kṛṣṇa. It is never to be broken. It is never to be broken. So if you want to relish the rasa, the mellow, the taste of friendship, make friendship with Kṛṣṇa. Kṛṣṇa is prepared to make you friend. Therefore He comes: "Please come. Become My friend." But we are denying. Make Kṛṣṇa your friend. Make Kṛṣṇa your son. Then you'll never lament, "Oh, my son is lost" or "My son has gone bad." No.

So this is Kṛṣṇa consciousness, the same thing. We are making temporary relationship in this material world, and that is being broken, so many families. Who knows what family I belonged to in my last birth? Might have been something else, not this family. We are changing our family because family means this body. I consider, "I belong to this family," because my body is produced from that family. The next life, the body is produced from another family. Then where is our family relationship? This is called māyā. In the material world, there cannot be anything fact. They are all illusion. The so-called family, the so-called friendship, the so-called lover, beloved, so-called paternal affection, sons, they are all simply... Māyā-sukhāya bharam udvahato vimūḍhān (SB 7.9.43). This was detected by Prahlāda Mahārāja. Prahlāda Mahārāja said to Nṛsiṁha-deva, "My Lord, I am not anxious at all for my welfare because I know that anywhere, if I simply remember Your transcendental pastimes, oh, I..." Śoce... Naivodvije para duratyaya-vaitaraṇyās tvad-vīrya-gāyana-mahāmṛta-magna-cittaḥ. Tvad-vīrya-gāyana-mahā. This chanting of Hare Kṛṣṇa mantra, or chanting Kṛṣṇa's pastime, it is just like ocean. So Prahlāda Mahārāja said that "I have learned this art.

1969 Conversations and Morning Walks

Room Conversation -- September 9, 1969, Hamburg:

Prabhupāda: So why don't you stay here and join your son for preaching Kṛṣṇa consciousness? Because your son is so good, you must be good. Because a son cannot be good unless the mother is good. Because son inherits the mother's quality. That is nature. This Hayagrīva's mother wrote me first one letter of congratulations, and she came also to see me in New Vrindaban, his father and mother. Especially his mother is very happy. This Kṛṣṇa consciousness movement will produce good father and mother, and therefore they will have good children, and there will be no problem in the world. If everyone is Kṛṣṇa conscious. Not everyone, even ten per cent people become Kṛṣṇa conscious, there will be no problem. Problem is created due to bad children. That is stated in the Bhagavad-gītā. Varṇa-saṅkara. So if there are good children, there is no problem. Even in this material world, everything will become happy. The basic principle of Vedic civilization is to create good children. All the rules and regulations, everything is there just to create good children. In the first chapter of Bhagavad-gītā these things are described very nicely by Arjuna. There are many purificatory processes to create a good child. A human being is not meant for creating offspring like cats and dogs. They must produce very good child. That is Vedic civilization. Good child means Kṛṣṇa conscious child. That's all. Yes. So we are trying to turn these children of the Western world, good children. And people should cooperate with us, this movement. We are taking care of the children, especially young boys and girls who are coming, and we are taking care of them very nicely. Sometimes we are getting them married also, to make their life very peaceful and intelligent and spiritually advanced and make a solution of life. So people should come forward to cooperate with this movement. How many children you have got? Two?

1971 Conversations and Morning Walks

Room Conversation with Mayor -- November 10, 1971, New Delhi:

Prabhupāda: But if he goes as my unmarried grandson...

Guest: Yes.

Prabhupāda: Then he can get. So that will be done. (Hindi) So your sons are very good sons. I have got all blessings for them. (Hindi)

Guest: (Hindi) You have so many grandsons, but I am the one erratic son, bad son.

Prabhupāda: (laughs) What is that problem?

Guest: Material problems. (Hindi)

Prabhupāda: (Hindi) I never told you that you give up your family life, but in family life you just chant Hare Kṛṣṇa. (Hindi conversation) There, there is a similar case in Lord Caitanya's time. The son became first a great devotee. So when the father came, then Caitanya Mahāprabhu, (indistinct). Then father said, "No. He is my father." (laughs) So (Hindi conversation) Political economics and...

Guest: Indian literature.

Prabhupāda: Indian Literature. That's nice. So their work is proposed to...

Guest: I think he should go there to study something, earn some money. That's all. (Hindi)

Prabhupāda: Huh?

1972 Conversations and Morning Walks

Room Conversation Including Discussion on SB 4.13.48 to SB 4.14.11 -- January 18, 1972, Jaipur:

Prabhupāda: Nirūpitaḥ prajā-pālaḥ sa jighāṁsati vai prajāḥ. So Vena, here it is mentioned, sunīthā-garbha-sambhavaḥ. His mother's name was Sunīthā. She was also daughter of a very bad king, and she inherited the father's quality. And the son also inherited the mother's quality. This is also true. The son inherits mother's quality, and the daughter inherits father's quality. So because the grandfather of Vena Maharaja was a bad man, his daughter means Sunīthā, the mother of Vena, she became bad. And naturally her son, Vena, she (he) became bad. The father was very nice, good king. But because the mother was not good, the son became bad. Here is the evidence. Sunīthā-garbha-sambhavaḥ. Sunīthā, his mother's name was Sunīthā. Because he was born in the womb of Sunīthā, a bad woman, therefore, he... Nirūpitaḥ prajā-pālaḥ sa jighāṁsati vai prajāḥ. He has been elected as the king to protect the citizens. Instead of protecting, he is disturbing.

nirūpitaḥ prajā-pālaḥ

sa jighāṁsati vai prajāḥ

tathāpi sāntvayemāmuṁ

nāsmāṁs tat-pātakaṁ spṛśet

(SB 4.14.11)

Now there is another saintly compassion, "Never mind he has done so much mischievous activities, this king, still it is our duty to go to him and give him good advice so that all these disturbances may be stopped and people will become happy." Just mark this point that formerly the government could not be irresponsible because the saintly person, they are always thinking welfare of the people in general. Mark this point.

1973 Conversations and Morning Walks

Conversation with Mr. Wadell -- July 10, 1973, London:

Prabhupāda: Yes. We do not do it. Just like your father says, "My dear son, do like this," but you disobey. Therefore you are bad son. So my badness is creation of my misuse of independence.

Mr. Wadell: Yes. But it may not be entirely willful.

Prabhupāda: Yes. Because God has given you the intelligence, and as I said, He can withdraw. Just like the same thing: The father said, "My dear son, do like this." But he is persisting in doing otherwise.

Mr. Wadell: Yes, and for the same reason that He would not force, would therefore, for the same reason, not withdraw my intellect, having given it to me.

Prabhupāda: Yes, that is stated, that is stated, that is stated. Just like I... Withdraw my intellect means I have given you the intellect that "You do like this." but you are persistent, doing otherwise, "All right, as you like, you do." This is withdrawal.

Mr. Wadell: Oh, yes, but one may be...

Prabhupāda: There is no force. There is no force.

Mr. Wadell: No, no. But what I want to go back to is the reason for disobedience. There are various possible ones. One may first not know what one is supposed to do. Secondly... Is that all right? Do you agree about that?

Prabhupāda: Oh, yes. We do not know anything. We are to be considered all fools and rascals. That is our position. As soon as we come to this material world, accept a material body, we are all fools and rascals.

1976 Conversations and Morning Walks

Morning Walk -- February 19, 1976, Mayapura:

Prabhupāda: No, it is not difficult. It is not difficult.

Acyutānanda: It is not difficult. They don't want to understand.

Prabhupāda: Because you are part and parcel of God, God has got full independence, but you have got little independence, proportionately, because you are part and parcel.

Acyutānanda: No, their idea is that they want to blame God for their predicament, like a bad child, you know, says, "Well you made me do it."

Prabhupāda: Yes.

Sudāmā: "What can I do?"

Prabhupāda: No, they say, "Why you gave me birth?" They say like that.

Sudāmā: Cursing almost. Almost.

Guru-kṛpā: Also the atheistic people sometimes argue, "What does your Kṛṣṇa do for the suffering people?"

Prabhupāda: Hm?

Guru-kṛpā: "What does He do? Why doesn't He come down and help the poor people? They are suffering."

Acyutānanda: I tell them there's...

Guru-kṛpā: "Why doesn't He come and help them?"

Morning Walk -- May 30, 1976, Honolulu:

Prabhupāda: Fantasy? Father is not fantasy. He is fact. You are grown up. You can leave the protection of the father. But how can you deny father? Then you are a rascal. It is not good to live independent of father. If the rich, opulent, very kind, very merciful, why shall I leave? A father is generally, even though he's personally a bad man, he's still, he's kind, merciful to the son. That he is, actually. A rogue, he loves—just like Ajāmila. He was a rogue, but he was taking care of the youngest child. This is nature, we study that even the father is a rogue, he's kind to his children. So practically he does all nonsense things, but giving protection to the family. So why should he give up the protection of father? When we say father, means all-kindness, all-mercifulness, all taking care. Immediately. In Bengali there is a word, putra davitra hoy, kumāra(?) (indistinct) (indistinct) A son may be bad, but his mother is never bad. Son may be bad, mother.... Son may be bad, but the mother or father is never bad. The father may also be bad, but the mother is never bad.

Hari-śauri: Cāṇakya Paṇḍita says that when one instance...

Prabhupāda: No, no. There is exception with everything.

Hari-śauri: Oh.