The girl must not be older than the boy. That's not good at all.
Prabhupāda: (reads Sanskrit) ...Aniya mahat-pado smariya gurave namaḥ.(?) In a short time he has learned very nicely.
- sahasra-pa-parābdamnam
- ācāryaṁ te māyāṁ sadā
- kintu tvamsudaya śilā
- tasmād tubhyāṁ namo namaḥ(?)
- namaste prabhupādāya
- śreṣṭha vedyaṁ dadāsi te
- tasya padāśraya-kośaṁ
- namaste gurave namaḥ(?)
- oṁ śrīmad-bhāgavataṁ gītā
- caitanya-caritāmṛta ca
- sundara-bhāgavatam cami
- bhaktiko manyave bhavān(?)
I am surprised that he has learned so quickly. Very nice.
Rādhā-vallabha: Very intelligent boy.
Prabhupāda: Yes. He should be given letter.(?)
Rādhā-vallabha: Anyway, he made one arrangement with another devotee to marry this devotee's daughter.
Prabhupāda: Hm?
Rādhā-vallabha: He is nineteen years old, and he made arrangement with...
Prabhupāda: This boy?
Rādhā-vallabha: Yes. The boy that wrote that. And he made arrangement with another devotee to marry her daughter at a later date. She's only twelve. So I've told him not to do anything until I spoke to you, because I don't think this has ever been done in our movement yet.
Prabhupāda: Hm?
Rādhā-vallabha: I don't think anyone has ever done this before in our movement, the Vedic system. So I had a few questions about it. First of all I told them that they shouldn't associate until the actual time that they get married. That's true, isn't it?
Prabhupāda: No, no, marriage, they do not speak. That is the disease in your country, that... There is no objection nineteen-years-old boy and twelve-years girl, it is very good combination, but the culture is so bad that after few days they will separate.
Rādhā-vallabha: Yes. That's the actual problem.
Prabhupāda: If they stick to have one husband and one wife, it is very good. Or even the man can marry more than one wife. That is allowed in the Vedic system. The difficulty is nobody remains as wife, nobody remains husband. It is very dangerous. That is against Vedic. Otherwise man can have more than one wife, but woman cannot marry more than one husband. But the system—the boys and girls intermingle so freely, and in your country there is no restriction—naturally it becomes adulterated. That is the danger.
Rādhā-vallabha: So he wanted to know that...
Prabhupāda: Knowing or no knowing, they'll not do with him. So what is the use of consulting me? They'll break. They'll promise and they'll break. How you can make them standardized? They will break.
Rādhā-vallabha: They have to be responsible people.
Prabhupāda: They'll never become. That is my experience. So what is the use of consulting me? They'll never become. Almost impossible. They'll not keep standardized.
Rādhā-vallabha: So it should just be up to them.
Prabhupāda: What is the use of consulting? They'll promise and they'll break.
Rādhā-vallabha: Yes, you were telling me in Hawaii about that, that that is the difficulty. They have no responsibility. All right, I'll tell him that.
Prabhupāda: Hm?
Rādhā-vallabha: I will tell him that.
Prabhupāda: Otherwise there is no objection. I married; my wife was eleven years old.
Rādhā-vallabha: You were responsible, though.
Prabhupāda: Eh?
Rādhā-vallabha: But you were responsible.
Prabhupāda: Everyone in India responsible. That is Indian culture still.
Rādhā-vallabha: Should... When they agree at this young age, they should wait till they get older, right?
Prabhupāda: Yes. Generally a girl attains puberty at fourteen years, thirteen years. In India because it is tropical climate... I think in Western countries they attain puberty not before fifteen, sixteen years. So although a girl is married before puberty, she is not allowed to go to the husband until she has attained puberty. Formerly, in our days also, after attaining puberty there is another second marriage. Then the husband and wife live together.
Rādhā-vallabha: Is there a minimum age for the man?
Prabhupāda: No. That is... Minimum age means generally the husband must be older than the wife, at least five years' difference.
Rādhā-vallabha: What is the most amount of years they can be different? What is the maximum amount of years there can be difference?
Prabhupāda: Man has no maximum. Even an eighty-years-old man can marry a sixteen-years-old girl. (laughter)
Rādhā-vallabha: Because this one devotee has a daughter twelve and he wanted to marry her to a man twenty-six, but he thought that was too much difference.
Prabhupāda: Yes. That is too much difference. But eight years, ten years usual.
Rādhā-vallabha: Eight or ten years is best. So he also wanted to know if...
Prabhupāda: That is healthy.
Rādhā-vallabha: He wanted to know also...
Prabhupāda: And in no case... The girl must not be older than the boy. That's not good at all.
Rādhā-vallabha: At the time of the agreement, when they are not yet old enough, they do not associate at all. So not until the actual marriage do they associate or wear white or anything like that.
Prabhupāda: No, even they can be married, but no association.
Rādhā-vallabha: No association. So the boy can be... If the girl has attained puberty say at thirteen, fourteen, even if the boy is only twenty, twenty-one it is all right. All right. I wanted to make sure. I wasn't allowing them to see each other. I wanted to make sure they weren't doing anything un-bona fide. So I'll tell him that. I have the... Jagannātha dāsa has done synonyms for Brahma-saṁhitā. For the Brahma-saṁhitā printing, Jagannātha dāsa has done some synonyms. Would you like to use the book also? I have the book here.
Prabhupāda: No... Yes. (Prabhupāda apparently looks them over) (break)