I passed my life as a householder until 1950, when I retired from family life as a vanaprastha

Expressions researched:
"I have left my family connection in 1950" |"I left home 1950. From '50 to '54 I lived in Jhansi" |"I passed my life as a householder until 1950, when I retired from family life as a vanaprastha" |"at last it happened so that I left my home in 1950 and became a vanaprastha"

CC Antya-lila

In this way I passed my life as a householder until 1950, when I retired from family life as a vānaprastha. With no companion, I loitered here and there until 1958, when I took sannyāsa. Then I was completely ready to discharge the order of my spiritual master.

CC Antya Concluding Words:

In this connection we may call to memory the time when I was fortunate enough to meet His Divine Grace Śrīla Prabhupāda, sometime in the year 1922. Śrīla Prabhupāda had come to Calcutta from Śrīdhāma Māyāpur to start the missionary activities of the Gauḍīya Maṭha. He was sitting in a house at Ulta Danga when through the inducement of an intimate friend, the late Śrīmān Narendranath Mullik, I had the opportunity to meet His Divine Grace for the first time. I do not remember the actual date of the meeting, but at that time I was one of the managers of Dr. Bose's laboratory in Calcutta. I was a newly married young man, addicted to Gandhi's movement and dressed in khadi. Fortunately, even at our first meeting His Divine Grace advised me to preach the cult of Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu in English in the Western countries. Because at that time I was a complete nationalist, a follower of Mahatma Gandhi's, I submitted to His Divine Grace that unless our country were freed from foreign subjugation, no one would hear the message of Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu seriously. Of course, we had some argument on this subject, but at last I was defeated and convinced that Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu's message is the only panacea for suffering humanity. I was also convinced that the message of Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu was then in the hands of a very expert devotee and that surely the message of Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu would spread all over the world. I could not, however, immediately take up his instructions to preach, but I took his words very seriously and was always thinking of how to execute his order, although I was quite unfit to do so.

In this way I passed my life as a householder until 1950, when I retired from family life as a vānaprastha. With no companion, I loitered here and there until 1958, when I took sannyāsa. Then I was completely ready to discharge the order of my spiritual master. Previously, in 1936, just before His Divine Grace passed away at Jagannātha Purī, I wrote him a letter asking what I could do to serve him. In reply, he wrote me a letter, dated 13 December 1936, ordering me, in the same way, to preach in English the cult of Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu as I had heard it from him.

Srimad-Bhagavatam Lectures

I have left my family connection in 1950. Actually '54, but introductory in '50.

Lecture on SB 5.5.1 -- Tittenhurst, London, September 12, 1969:

When I was householder, several times there was indication given by my Guru Mahārāja that I should give up family life and become a sannyāsī and preach this Kṛṣṇa consciousness movement. In several way there was hints from my spiritual master, but still, I was not willing. I was thinking, "If I go away, then my family, my sons, my daughters, they will suffer." But actually, I have left my family connection in 1950. Actually '54, but introductory in '50. For the last twenty years. But they are living; I am living. They are not dying in my absence, and I am not suffering without being in my family. On the other hand, by Kṛṣṇa's grace, I have got better family members. I have got nice children in a foreign country. They are taking so much care of me, I could not expect such care from my own children.

Festival Lectures

At last it happened so that I left my home in 1950 and became a vānaprastha. I was living sometimes here and there. In 1959 I took sannyāsa. But that Back to Godhead was going on.

His Divine Grace Srila Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Gosvami Prabhupada's Appearance Day, Evening -- Gorakhpur, February 15, 1971:

Prabhupāda: Then there were other Godbrothers. I consulted him that "Guru Mahārāja said like this. What can I do?" So they also encouraged me. I was writing. There was a paper, Harmonist. Then, by their desires, I started this Back to Godhead in 1944. That was also started on his advent day, this advent day. Back to Godhead was started. Yes. There was a meeting, and many friends came, and we first started this Back to Godhead on his advent day, this advent day, 1944. So our paper, Back to Godhead, the advent day is also today. Yes.

Haṁsadūta: Doubly auspicious.

Prabhupāda: Yes. So at that time, there was no sale of Back to Godhead. I was publishing about one thousand copies and distributing. So there was no income. I was spending three hundred, four hundred rupees from my pocket. At that time, I had income. Then, gradually... I wanted to remain as a gṛhastha and preach, but Guru Mahārāja did not like this idea. I could understand. Sometime I was dreaming that he was calling me, and I was horrified that "I'll have to go away from home." (laughter) So at last it happened so that I left my home in 1950 and became a vānaprastha. I was living sometimes here and there. In 1959 I took sannyāsa. But that Back to Godhead was going on. Then there was some inner dictation that "This paper, Back to Godhead, I am publishing, people are taking." Some friend advised me that "Why don't you write some books? That will be nice." So then I began to translate Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam. And because I left home, so practically I had no income. With this Bhāgavatam, er, Back to Godhead, I was selling and I was some way or other maintaining. And whatever little money I had, that was finished.

1973 Conversations and Morning Walks

I left home in 1950. Whatever was there, "All right, you do whatever you like." In 1954, four years I remained as vānaprastha.

Room Conversation -- March 17, 1973, Mayapur:

Śrīdhara Mahārāja: First appearance of Back to Godhead (indistinct).

Prabhupāda: Yes, 1944. I think you were at that time at my house. Yes. So, somehow or other, this intention for preaching the cult of Caitanya Mahāprabhu increased and the other side decreased. Viraktir anyatra syāt. But I was not disinclined, but Kṛṣṇa forced me that you must give up. (chuckles) And these thing is known better to Śrīdhara Mahārāja, how it decreased, decreased, decreased, then almost it become nil, and then I left home in 1950. Whatever was there, "All right, you do whatever you like." In 1954, four years I remained as vānaprastha, (indistinct) four years, from 1950 to 1959.

1976 Conversations and Morning Walks

I left home 1950. From '50 to '54 I lived in Jhansi.

Room Conversation -- October 3, 1976, Vrndavana:

Hari-śauri: The boy at the front, he's reading one of your old Bhāgavatams. He has one of your original Bhāgavatams. The boy at the front that's on guard. Akṣaya, the boy that guards. He's been reading one of your original Bhāgavatams, the 1.1.

Prabhupāda: Oh.

Hari-śauri: And I was looking at the front and it gives your residence in Vṛndāvana at Rādhā-Dāmodara and your office in Delhi.

Prabhupāda: It was not unpleasant. When I was living alone, doing everything, it was not unpleasant. I was... Very nice. That was an accident. Otherwise, it was not unpleasant. Alone everything I was doing. Rather, I had not so much anxiety for management. Even my, this son came to live with me. I said, "No, you don't."

Hari-śauri: Who was that? Vṛndāvana there?

Prabhupāda: Hmm. They sent, my family, to go and live with me. He came twice, thrice. The reason is that I asked him "If you want to live with me then you have to live with me as sannyāsī, brahmacārī.

Hari-śauri: And he couldn't.

Prabhupāda: Otherwise... From 1954, '55. Up to '54... 1950, I left home 1950. From '50 to '54 I lived in Jhansi.

Hari-śauri: That was when you started the League of Devotees?

Prabhupāda: Hmm. At that time there were many students. They were not my disciples, but they were coming. Like... that Prabhākāra?

Hari-śauri: Yes, Prabhākāra Ācārya.

Prabhupāda: He was the head.

Hari-śauri: (laughs) You were teaching Vaiṣṇavism or...

Prabhupāda: Yes. I wanted to start from there. It was very nice, big house. But this K. Munshi's wife tactfully wanted me to... The Governor's wife. That was a very big house.

Hari-śauri: Oh, there were some politics. I didn't know.

Prabhupāda: But he peacefully took it. I could have fought but I did not like. All the pleaders in Jhansi, they said, "Don't leave." She was pressing through the collectors, to the manager. That house belonged to some zamindar. But it was under the management of another man, Reba Shankara(?). So he was proprietor of one cinema hall. So the governor's wife was pressing him through the collector because the license has to be renewed from the collector. Collector was insisting that "You give that house, Lilavati Munshi. Indirectly. Otherwise, your license will not be issued."