His Divine Grace, my spiritual master, somehow or other liked me, that I should take up this responsibility. And on the first day I met him, I was at (that) time a very young man, a nationalist, and engaged in a very responsible office. So one of my friends casually took me. I did not like to go. But I am very much thankful to that friend, who is still living in Calcutta, that he forcibly took me to His Divine Grace. I was reluctant to see because in our house my father used to receive so many sannyāsīns, but I was not very much satisfied with their dealings. So I thought that Bhaktisiddhānta Sarasvatī Gosvāmī Mahārāja might be a similar man. So what business I have got to see him? But this friend took me forcibly, that "Why not see the man?"
So I went on his request, and I was so profited. So on the first visit he asked me that "Educated boys like you, you should go to foreign countries and preach the gospel of Caitanya Mahāprabhu. There is great necessity." So I replied that "We are foreign-dominated nation, India. Who will hear about our message?" Actually, at that time the foreigners were thinking Indians as very nonsignificant because in the face of so many independent nations, India was dependent. There was one poet, Bengali poet. He lamented that "Even uncivilized nations like China, Japan and Burmese..." Not Burma. Burma was also dependent. "They are independent, and only India is dependent on the Britishers." So anyway, my Guru Mahārāja, he convinced me that "Dependence, independence, they are temporary. But we are concerned with the eternal benefit of the human kind, and therefore you should take up this matter."
So I never thought that I will have to take up this matter by his order. Because it is... This incident took place in 1922, more than fifty years. So anyway, so I was officially initiated in 1933, just before three years of his passing away from this mortal world. So at the last moment also, just a fortnight before his passing away, he wrote me the same thing. I wrote him one letter and just he replied the same thing that "You should try to preach this gospel amongst the persons who are conversant in English language. That will be very nice for you." So I was dreaming sometimes that my Guru Mahārāja is calling me and I am leaving my home and going behind him. I was dreaming like that, and I was thinking, "Oh, I have to give up my home? My Guru Mahārāja wants me to give up my home life and take sannyāsa?" So I was thinking, "It is horrible. How can I leave my home?" This is called māyā. Of course, it's a long story, but incidentally I am speaking to you because you are my dear children. So I was thinking that "How can I take sannyāsa and leave my home, my children?" So that was a horrible thought for me, I tell you. I was thinking seriously, "Oh, I will have to take this course. Guru Mahārāja wants me." But actually I did not like to give up my home life. But Guru Mahārāja made me obliged to give up my home life. So now, by his order, or by his plan, I gave up my home life, I gave up a few children, but Guru Mahārāja is so kind that has given me so many nice children.
So by serving Kṛṣṇa, nobody becomes loser. This is my practical ex..., I mean, practical experience, nobody. So I am citing this example of my personal experience because... Just try to understand that before leaving my home was thinking that "I may be in great trouble." Especially when I left my home for your country in 1965 alone, the government would not allow me to take any money. I had only a few book and forty rupees, Indian forty rupees. So I came in New York in such condition, but by the grace of my spiritual master Bhaktisiddhānta Sarasvatī Gosvāmī Mahārāja, and by the grace of Kṛṣṇa, everything happens by combined mercy of Kṛṣṇa and spiritual master.
In the Caitanya-caritāmṛta it is said, guru-kṛṣṇa kṛpāya pāya bhakti-latā-bīja (CC Madhya 19.151). There shall be combined mercy of Kṛṣṇa and guru. Then our mission of Kṛṣṇa consciousness will be successful. This is the secret. Kṛṣṇa is always within you. Īśvaraḥ sarva-bhūtānāṁ hṛd-deśe arjuna tiṣṭhati (BG 18.61). Therefore Kṛṣṇa knows everything of your purpose, and He gives you opportunity to work as you have decided. If you decide to enjoy this material world, Kṛṣṇa will give you intelligence how to become very nice businessman, nice politician, very nice cunning man so that you can earn money and enjoy senses. Kṛṣṇa will give you intelligence. So many people are becoming very great in the estimation of material life. From very poor man, they are becoming millionaires. How? They have got intelligence, certainly. Without intelligence they cannot improve. But that intelligence is also given by Kṛṣṇa. It is stated in the Bhagavad-gītā, sarvasya cāhaṁ hṛdi sanniviṣṭo: (BG 15.15) "I am sitting in everyone's heart." Mattaḥ smṛtir jñānam apohanaṁ ca: "By Me, there is memory and by Me, there is forgetfulness." So how Kṛṣṇa is giving forgetfulness, also memory? That means according to my desire. If I want to forget Kṛṣṇa and I want to enjoy this material world, He will give me necessary intelligence so that I can forget Kṛṣṇa for good and I can enjoy this material world very nicely.
It is not possible to enjoy this material world nicely. This is called illusion. Everyone is trying to enjoy this material world very nicely. That is illusion. There is no nice enjoyment. You can rise up to a very nice post, just like the President Kennedy. Oh, with great endeavor he rose up to that post, and all of a sudden he was shot down. So this material world is like that. You cannot have, I mean to say, undeterred, without any impediment, pleasure. No. Every step you want to enjoy material enjoyment and you have to face every step danger also. This is the process. So one who is intelligent, as it is stated in the Caitanya-caritāmṛta, kṛṣṇa ye bhaje se baḍa catura. Unless one is perfectly intelligent and perfectly cleansed, one cannot take to Kṛṣṇa consciousness. So therefore guru-kṛṣṇa kṛpā pāya bhakti-latā-bīja. Kṛṣṇa is seated within everyone's heart. If we want Kṛṣṇa sincerely, and how we want Kṛṣṇa sincerely? That is the mercy of the spiritual master.
Kṛṣṇa says in the Bhagavad-gītā, sarva-dharmān parityajya mām ekaṁ śaraṇaṁ vraja (BG 18.66). He gives the instruction that "Give up all this nonsense, your material activities. Just surrender unto Me." But people are not very interested. Even open declaration by Kṛṣṇa, that "You just become surrendered unto Me. I will give you all protection from all sinful reaction. You just come to Me," but people still, they are so much attached to illusion, māyā, that they cannot do it. But the spiritual master, he is so kind that he is begging from door to door, from country to country, from town to town, "My dear ladies, my dear gentlemen, my dear boys, my dear girls, please take to Kṛṣṇa consciousness." So therefore he is doing very confidential service to Kṛṣṇa. Kṛṣṇa is the Supreme Lord. He gives simply orders. But the spiritual master executes that order practically. Therefore spiritual master is so dear to Kṛṣṇa. Yasya prasādād bhāgavata-prasādaḥ. So guru-kṛṣṇa kṛpāya pāya bhakti-latā-bīja (CC Madhya 19.151).