Maintaining a family (Conv and Letters)

Expressions researched:
"family" |"maintain" |"maintained" |"maintainer" |"maintaining" |"maintains" |"maintenance"

Notes from the compiler: Vedabase query: "family maintain*" @ 20

1969 Conversations and Morning Walks

Room Conversation -- September 24, 1969, London:

Prabhupāda: The so-called politicians, they promise that "I shall give you so many things." But actually, he is trying to occupy the post for his satisfaction. These are all false promises. Why politicians? Even in our family life we maintain wife, children. Why? For my satisfaction. As soon as there is discrepancy in my satisfaction I divorce my wife. Or the wife sees that "This husband is useless." She also divorces. So everywhere, the whole material world is going on on the basis of sense satisfaction.

1970 Conversations and Morning Walks

Room Conversation -- December 12, 1970, Indore:

Guest (4): I would like to live with you and tour with you.

Prabhupāda: So why not come and live and tour with me? Who forbids you? But it is not possible to pay anything for your family expenditure. That is difficulty. We cannot pay anything but you can live with your family. That responsibility you can take. But I cannot pay you. That's not possible. Because we are maintaining by collecting alms. In that case it is not possible to pay something.

Room Conversation -- December 12, 1970, Indore:

Prabhupāda: What amount you want for your family, minimum?

Guest (4): Five hundred a month.

Prabhupāda: That is not possible. Yes, you require five hundred. I know that. That is not much. To maintain a family nowadays five hundred rupees is not much but where is the money? How can I pay you?

1973 Conversations and Morning Walks

Morning Walk -- April 20, 1973, Los Angeles:

Prabhupāda: The modern material civilization is wasting time, so-called advancement of material comforts. Simply wasting time. Nidrayā hriyate naktaṁ vyavāyena ca vā vayaḥ (SB 2.1.3). They are wasting time at night either by sleeping or by sexual intercourse. Divā cārthehayā rājan kuṭumba-bharaṇena vā. And during daytime, simply: "Where is money? Where is money? Where is money?" And as soon as they get money, they spend it for kuṭumba-bharaṇa, for maintaining the family. This is their business. The sum total of modern civilization.

Room Conversation with David Wynne, Sculptor -- July 9, 1973, London:

Prabhupāda: That means you want to compare with your, this foolish, imperfect personality with God's personality. That is our defect. He's distinct from our personality, but He's a person. Yes. Nityo nityānāṁ cetanaś cetanānām eko bahūnāṁ yo vidadhāti kāmān (Kaṭha Upaniṣad 2.2.13). He's also a person like us, He's also living entity like us. But what is the difference? He's the maintainer; we are maintained. How many persons you can maintain? A family of two children and one wife, you are embarrassed. And He's maintaining everyone. Eko bahūnāṁ yo vidadhāti... Innumerable living entities, He's supplying food everyone.

Room Conversation with David Wynne, Sculptor -- July 9, 1973, London:

Prabhupāda: In the air, within the water, there are so many living entities. In the air there are so many living entities. On the land there are so many living entities. Everywhere. How He's feeding? That is the distinction between God's personality and our personality. We are embarrassed to maintain a family of four, five members, and He is maintaining the whole family of living entities. Not only one planet, there are innumerable planets. And not only innumerable planets, the one universe, then innumerable universes. And these, all these taken together, this is one-fourth creation of God.

Room Conversation with Father Tanner and other guests -- July 11, 1973, London:

Prabhupāda: What is the difference between God and ourself? God is also a living entity like us, but He's the chief living entity. He's maintaining all others. Therefore we have to ask God, "Give us our daily bread." He's the maintainer; we are maintained. Just like in a family, the father is the maintainer, and the mother and the children and the servants, they are maintained, similarly the whole universe, whole creation, it is maintained by God, and we living entities, within this universe or within this creation, we are maintained.

Room Conversation -- September 19, 1973, Bombay:

Prabhupāda: Just like your son. Is he not maintaining his family, is he not respecting his father, mother, he is not doing his duty in the service, he is doing his spiritual master? But the main principle is that he is devotee of Kṛṣṇa. So if you become devotee of Kṛṣṇa, you can discharge your duties properly; otherwise you cannot. It is not possible.

Morning Walk -- December 16, 1973, Los Angeles:

Prabhupāda: You fill, that's all right, but if you cannot... That is the question. (laughter) Our definition of God is that He maintains everyone. Can you maintain everyone?

Karandhara: They are thinking they are maintaining.

Prabhupāda: They again thinking. What is your present position? You are maintained. You cannot maintain. You are maintained by your boss. He gives you some salary and you fill up your bellies. You rascal, you want to be maintainer. You cannot maintain even a family of five heads. Therefore we say, all full of rascals.

1974 Conversations and Morning Walks

Morning Walk -- March 31, 1974, Bombay:

Prabhupāda: Parāyanaḥ. So they think, "Now my day's business is finished. Now I have eaten." And dakṣyaṁ kuṭumba-bharaṇam. And if one man can maintain a family of four, five, men, "Oh, he's Mahārāja Dakṣa." Mahārāja Dakṣa, you know? He was a great personality. He was performing yajñas. So this is Kali-yuga. Even they will not be able to maintain a wife, a few children. There is no shelter. I have seen in, all these things in western countries. They have no fixed up. Just like animals. The animal also loitering in the street or in the jungle; they are loitering in a great jungle, a great city. That's all.

Morning Walk -- April 13, 1974, Bombay:

Prabhupāda: ...gṛha-medhinām. Apaśyatām ātma-tattvaṁ gṛheṣu gṛha-medhinām (SB 2.1.2). Those who are gṛhamedhis and do not know anything else except maintaining the family, they are called gṛhamedhi. And those who cultivating spiritual consciousness in gṛhastha life with family and children, they are called gṛhasthas. That is the difference between gṛhamedhi and gṛhastha.

1975 Conversations and Morning Walks

Room Conversation with Woman Sanskrit Professor -- February 13, 1975, Mexico:

Prabhupāda: The purpose is pleasure. Just like a small example, a family man. The father is the chief man in the family. The mother is there, the children are there, all together. But the father is the chief man in the family. He is maintaining the family, and there is ānanda, pleasure. Similarly, ānanda is the aim of both, all the eternals, the chief eternal or the subordinate eternal. But the supplier is the chief eternal. So when we come together, the chief eternal and the subordinate eternals, and enjoy together, that is the purpose of life.

Room Conversation with Professors -- February 19, 1975, Caracas:

Prabhupāda: Just like we see on the road, cars are running with great speed, this way and that way, but they do not know what is the aim of life. Ask any one of them that "What is the aim of life, and why you are running so speedily, and what is the business?" Everyone will say, "I have got business. I am going hurriedly." And if I ask, "What is that business?" "Business means to earn some money and maintain the family." that's all. So is it a fact that to earn some money and maintain the family or at night sleep or sex indulgence, is that the aim of life? So that is my submission to the heads of the cultural movement. Is that the cultural end, to sleep at night or sex indulgence and at night earn money and maintain the family? I am asking this question.

Meeting with GBC -- March 31, 1975, Mayapur:

Prabhupāda: ...otherwise, we recommend everyone become sannyāsa. What is the use of not becoming? (all laugh) We are giving up this world. We are preparing ourself for entering into the family of Kṛṣṇa. So why should we be very much anxious to maintain this family.

Morning Walk -- April 5, 1975, Mayapur:

Prabhupāda: No, no. The dog also allows the nipple to be sucked by the cubs. That is family maintenance. So what credit do you get by family maintenance? Why do you specially claim any benefit by maintain...? That is being done by the cats and dogs. Do you think that the animals do not take care of their children? Then if you take, then what is the difference between him and yourself?

Morning Walk -- April 5, 1975, Mayapur:

Prabhupāda: Your main business is to become Kṛṣṇa conscious. If you forget that—you remain cats and dogs—then you'll become again cats and dogs. Punar muṣiko bhava: "Again become a mouse." The mouse was given the chance to elevate gradually to a tiger, and when he became tiger, he wanted to devour the saintly person. And he said, "All right, again you become mouse." That is also... You are given the chance of self-realization. If you do not do it, then again become cats and dogs, maintain your family.

Room Conversation with Director of Research of the Dept. of Social Welfare -- May 21, 1975, Melbourne:

Prabhupāda: Sex life we are not stopping. But sex life allowed only to the gṛhasthas, householder, restricted. Not illicit sex. We are not stopping sex life. Sex life is required. But under rules. And if you enjoy illicit sex, then the whole society is spoiled. You make the innocent girls spoiled. And they have no other business than prostitution. That means you put the society into chaotic condition. The young girls they become cheap, you enjoy, then you become irresponsible. You have no family encumbrances, and you do not know how to maintain the family. That is the position. What is this welfare? Because the young boys enjoy the young girls and they get children, the government has to support.

Morning Walk -- July 11, 1975, Chicago:

Prabhupāda: Yes, that is rich man. That is the explanation given by Marshall, a great economist. He says that unless one is obliged to work, nobody will work. That is his economic impetus. So the family affection gives impetus to work. He has to maintain the family. That is, he says, that is the beginning of economic development. Marshall theory.

Walk Around Farm -- August 1, 1975, New Orleans:

Devotee (4): Srila Prabhupāda? A materialist or someone who wouldn't know, he may say that when the bull is not plowing, all he is doing is eating. You have to pay money to feed him grain or to grow grain to feed the bull.

Prabhupāda: They will grow, and they will eat. Rather, they will help you for your eating. The father also eats, but he maintains the family. Therefore the bull is considered as father and the cow as mother. Mother gives milk, and the bull grows food grains for man. Therefore Caitanya Mahāprabhu first challenged that Kazi that "What is your religion, that you eat your father and mother?"

Morning Walk -- November 3, 1975, Bombay:

Prabhupāda: There are many cases. This is the statement in the Bhāgavata. Dampatye ratim eva hi: "Marriage relationship will continue only on sex power, that's all." If one is weak in sex power, the marriage will be cancelled.

Dr. Patel: You must tell any other good messages, how actually a marriage is, can be for production of good progeny...

Prabhupāda: Yes. Putrārthe kriyate bharyā putra-piṇḍa-prayojanam. This, the first, piṇḍa-dāna for maintaining family. But nowadays nobody wants offspring. They want to kill to avoid botheration.

1976 Conversations and Morning Walks

Morning Walk -- April 26, 1976, Melbourne:

Prabhupāda: The anxiety should be purified from material contamination, and it should be only for Kṛṣṇa. Then it is perfect. Here the anxiety with some designation, "I am the father of this family," this is my anxiety, how to maintain them. "I am the leader of this nation." That is my anxiety. So all these anxieties are material, upādhi. I am neither father nor leader. I am servant of Kṛṣṇa. I have created artificial anxieties. So therefore I have to become free from this artificial anxiety.

Interview with Professors O'Connell, Motilal and Shivaram -- June 18, 1976, Toronto:

Prof. O'Connell: Swamiji, could you speak a bit about the proper attitude of the child towards the father? Is it one of fear, respect, love?

Prabhupāda: Love. Basic relation love. Father loves the child, naturally. The child also naturally loves the father. This is natural relationship. Father works whole day and night for maintaining the children, family, and if the child out of love takes his lozenges and offers to the father, "Father, it is very nice, you take," father will be very glad. "Oh, yes, yes, I'll take."

Radio Interview -- July 27, 1976, London:

Prabhupāda: Accept the supreme controller, everything is clear. Accept the father, everything is clear. There is mother, there is children, no father. How rascal they have made. How it can be? No experience, and still they will persist, "No father." Can you show me the father? What is nonsense, if you do not see the father, it does not mean that there is no father? Father must be there. You may not have seen, that is different thing. And you can see the father because the father is maintaining the family order. Therefore there is father. From this simple analogy.

Room Conversation -- August 2, 1976, New Mayapur (French farm):

Hari-śauri: Your nephew was a taxi driver.

Prabhupāda: Yes. Nephew was my sister's son. We had to maintain one sister and her family. She became widow. So this is Hindu family obligation. When the daughter is widow, she comes to the father's shelter with all family. The father has to maintain.

Morning Walk at Niavaran Park -- August 8, 1976, Tehran:

Pradyumna: So we analyze the material body is temporary, it's no good anyways, then if, even if someone says, "Well, it may be temporary, but in this life we can get something out of it," then we analyze that other people are taking that. The wife is taking that, the children are taking that.

Prabhupāda: No, we should first of all fix up what is our business. People have taken this, that to maintain the body, to maintain the family, to earn money and protect it, these have become their business. They do not know anything else.

Morning Walk at Niavaran Park -- August 8, 1976, Tehran:

Prabhupāda: Who asks you that you live discomfortably? You live comfortably. But you must know the aim of life. That they do not know. Ask anybody what is the aim, why you are working so hard, why you are maintaining family, why you are maintaining body, what is the aim of your life? That they do not know.

Morning Walk and Room Conversation -- August 9, 1976, Tehran:

Prabhupāda: A father creates family for his own enjoyment. Wife, children, he wants enjoyment—society, family. Therefore he takes the risk of maintaining so many people. He feels some enjoyment, therefore he takes the risk. Otherwise he has no business. Why should he create unnecessary trouble to maintain a family, maintain wife, children and society? The principle is if you create something, it is created for your personal enjoyment.

Room Conversation -- September 16, 1976, Vrndavana:

Prabhupāda: Otherwise, we have seen in our childhood how happy people were. They were. Simple. If one has five rupees income per month he's happy. I've seen it. Husband, wife, a small family. If he has got five rupees income, they can maintain very nicely, happily. Why not?

1977 Conversations and Morning Walks

Room Conversation -- January 8, 1977, Bombay:

Prabhupāda: Because if the government is plunderer, then there is no other. This time is coming. The government will plunder in the name of taxation, and there will be no rainfall, scarcity of food. So everyone will feel very difficult to maintain the family. They'll leave voluntarily and go away. This is foretold.

Room Conversation -- January 21, 1977, Bhuvanesvara:

Prabhupāda: Yes. That is gentlemanly, that "Why shall I take responsibility of family if I cannot maintain them properly?" That is very gentlemanly. That is civilization. "And I accept so-called family for sense gratification; I cannot maintain them and kill them"—what is this? Is that civilization? They should be ashamed to be called civilized men.

Evening Darsana -- January 23, 1977, Bhuvanesvara:

Prabhupāda: Udaraṁ bharatā. Dakṣyaṁ udaraṁ bhāratā. Bas, Kali-yuga. Somehow or other, if you can fill up your bellies, then you are very expert. That is going on. If you can maintain your family nicely, then you are dakṣya. Dakṣyaṁ udaraṁ bhāratā. These symptoms are there in the Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam. Because the Kali-yuga, it is so condemned that it will be difficult to maintain one's body and soul together, that udaraṁ bharita is very expert. He's maintaining.

Morning Walk -- January 24, 1977, Bhuvanesvara:

Hari-śauri: The thing is the parents are not qualified to give any guidance any more either.

Prabhupāda: Qualified, that is not very difficult. For the girl, find out a boy who is hard worker or a little educated. Bas. That's all. That was the selection. Then fortune. You give a daughter under the care of the boy who can work hard. That's all. They then will earn their livelihood. Even there is no education, a hard worker will do. A boy, as soon as has got the sense that "I have got a wife to maintain," he'll work. That is impetus to give him to work for the family. And if a boy gets wife or woman without any hard working, they why he should marry? And if he has got responsibility that "I have to maintain my wife; then I can enjoy," then he becomes responsible.

Conversation: Vairagya, Salaries, and Political Etiquette -- April 28, 1977, Bombay:

Tamāla Kṛṣṇa: I was reading the life sketch of Bhaktivinoda Ṭhākura. He always maintained a government service job, and still...

Prabhupāda: He gave so much service to Kṛṣṇa. From his family maintenance... He could have renounced, but he said that the family has to be maintained.

Conversation with M.P., Shri Sita Ram Singh -- May 19, 1977, Vrndavana:

Prabhupāda: Take for example, in our childhood my father's income was, utmost, three hundred rupees. So we were not very rich men. But we had no want. Father was maintaining his family, getting children married, distributing the wealth. Everything very nice. And we never felt any want. In this mango season, because father saw it that "There must be a full basket of mangoes daily for the children," so we were jumping, playing and eating mangoes.

Conversation with Svarupa Damodara -- June 21, 1977, Vrndavana:

Prabhupāda: The Supreme Being is the chief living being. There are so many living beings, but He is the original living being. He is original, eternal substance, and the living beings, the are also eternal, same quality, but He is the Supreme. How He is Supreme? Because He maintains these eternal living beings, and the other living beings, they are maintained by Him. Just like in a family the father is the chief man and he maintains the family, similarly God is the Supreme Being. He maintains all other living beings.

Conversation with Svarupa Damodara -- June 21, 1977, Vrndavana:

Svarūpa Dāmodara: Jaya. If a scientist thinks very carefully...

Prabhupāda: Yes.

Svarūpa Dāmodara: ...actually he will be the one who will accept there is God, because we see practically every... In every experiment.

Prabhupāda: You are God—limited. Limited God. You cannot maintain. Therefore you are limited. You can become God within your family, within your office, within your kingdom. You are not Supreme God. To a limited extent you are God.

Room Conversation about Grhasthas -- July 17, 1977, Vrndavana:

Upendra: Prabhupādajī? I have one question since you are speaking about gṛhastha. If a brahmacārī decides to get married and then enters into married life, should he be encouraged to maintain that responsibility throughout his life?

Prabhupāda: No, no, unless he can maintain family, why should he marry?

Room Conversation about Grhasthas -- July 17, 1977, Vrndavana:

Tamāla Kṛṣṇa: Of course, he might be thinking, "Well, I'm a pūjārī, so the temple should pay me money to maintain my family."

Prabhupāda: If we have got brahmacārī pūjārī, why should we maintain a gṛhastha? He is not only one pūjārī. We have got sannyāsī, brahmacārī. Why should we maintain a gṛhastha? And where is the means? After all, these things are to be adjusted. I can give you the ideas. The pūjārīs were given in Vṛndāvana the temple, and they made it a source of income. Just like the gosāis are doing. Their pūjā goes to hell.

Room Conversation about Grhasthas -- July 17, 1977, Vrndavana:

Prabhupāda: Mean these gṛhastha pūjārī. Gradually the pūjā will go to hell. They'll gradually glide down how to maintain family by showing the Deity. That is... The gosāis are doing. People have sentiment to give something to the Deity, and they will depend on that income. Bas. This is the position of these Vṛndāvana temple. What is the position of the Rādhā-Ramaṇa? Deterioration. It is not being properly done. They'll sell the property.

1967 Correspondence

Letter to Hamsaduta -- Vrindaban 15 August, 1967:

So if you like you can take a job in N.Y. or elsewhere and settle as an ordinary householder, like Rupanuga and others; or, if you prefer, you can continue to work within the Temple, either at Montreal or wherever there is sufficient space to accommodate you. But you must think of your health. I had already noticed a deterioration when I was in N.Y., and now you say it has gotten worse. That is not good, and you must correct it. So do the needful. Above all don't be worried. Krishna will help you. If it is necessary to go to work in order to maintain you wife and family nicely, Krishna will give you all support necessary.

1968 Correspondence

Letter to Brahmananda -- Los Angeles 16 November, 1968:

We shall not accept any outside work, and by selling books and magazines, we shall have to maintain the family of our devotees, or the brahmacaris. That should be the ideal work. We shouldn't depend for maintaining the workers by accepting outside job works.

1971 Correspondence

Letter to Sucandra -- Mombassa, Kenya 19 September, 1971:

Your duty is to take charge of your wife. So you can stick to your job and maintain your wife and family and give as fast as possible to the Hamburg temple. You cannot be irresponsible to your wife and child. That is not allowed. If you can go with your wife to Munich to open a center there certainly I have no objection. That is a different thing. But you cannot leave your wife to go to Munich.

1973 Correspondence

Letter to Karandhara -- Bombay 9 January, 1973:

Actually the system of polygamy is natural because the human entity is meant for transcending the animal forms of life and going back to home, back to Godhead. Therefore there should remain a class of men who do not marry in the society. But that will create an unfavorable situation of excessive population of unmarried women. Therefore it is advised that all women get themselves married, and if there is any man who is better able to maintain wife and family, he is advised to marry as many women as he can maintain and thereby free other men in the society to remain brahmacari.

Letter to Isvara -- Bhaktivedanta Manor 17 July, 1973:

One thing, however, is that living as a householder you cannot go into the streets and hold sankirtana and sell our books as a means of maintenance. Such sankirtana activity can be done with the devotees of our temple in Scotland, but cannot be done independently. If you wish to live separately you have to earn your livelihood by business, by taking some employment to maintain your home and family. But not by chanting in the street; this is not a good idea for householders.

1974 Correspondence

Letter to Gopala Krsna -- Bombay 28 November, 1974:

You are a very good boy. I know that whatever money you have left over from maintaining your family, you give that to the Society. You do not even keep anything for yourself. This is very good.

1976 Correspondence

Letter to Mr. Raja Sajid Husain -- Los Angeles 4 June, 1976:

"All the demigods and their exalted qualities, such as religion, knowledge, and renunciation, become manifest in the body of one who has developed unalloyed devotion for the Supreme Personality of Godhead, Vasudeva. On the other hand, a person devoid of devotional service and engaged in material activities has no good qualities. Even if he is adept at the practice of mystic yoga or the honest endeavour of maintaining his family and relatives, he must be driven by his own mental speculations and must engage in the service of the Lord's external energy. How can such a man possess any good qualities?"

Letter to Rupanuga -- Vrindaban 8 November, 1976:

This incident with the president of our Washington temple is not good. He can't even maintain one wife. Just see how lusty he is. Now he'll dare to take another. Anyway he cannot live in the temple. If he wants two wives it must be done outside. He should maintain his family by working and give 50% to the temple. He may not live off temple funds. Temple president is generally meant for sannyasi, but a grhastha may be if he is restrained. It is not good if he remains as president.