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Good wife (Lectures and Conversations)

Lectures

Srimad-Bhagavatam Lectures

Just like a debauched husband sometimes entreats the good wife and the good wife tolerates.
Lecture on SB 1.2.6 -- London, August 26, 1971:

Now lover and beloved, one is anxious to see the other. If the lover sees the beloved, he becomes happy. But Caitanya Mahāprabhu says that "If You make Me unhappy for many thousands of years by Your disappearance, but by not being present before Me, I don't mind." Just see. "I don't mind." Āśliṣya: "You either embrace Me, or You trample Me down with Your feet, You are at liberty, whatever You like." Lampaṭa. Lampaṭa, just like a debauched husband sometimes entreats the good wife and the good wife tolerates. There are many instances, such thing, India still, but that is diminishing. Of course, if we say so many stories, it will take... But there are many examples. I have got personal experience of my youngest sister, you see. She is dead and gone. Her husband was a first-class debauchee.

They are thinking that these four things will save him. No. "Now we are situated in a very nice bungalow, very good income, very good wife and children." But any moment you can be kicked out of this situation, and you have to accept another body which is not very comfortable. This is nature's law.
Lecture on SB 1.2.10 -- Delhi, November 16, 1973:

So tattva-jijñāsā. Everyone should be inquisitive to inquire about the value of life, not like cats and dogs, no inquiry, simply... We go, walk, walking in the morning. We see so many nice bungalows—they are sleeping, as if the sleeping will save him. No. Āhāra-nidrā-bhaya-maithuna. These four things. They are thinking that these four things will save him. No. "Now we are situated in a very nice bungalow, very good income, very good wife and children." But any moment you can be kicked out of this situation, and you have to accept another body which is not very comfortable. This is nature's law. This is tattva-jijñāsā. If we simply foolishly think, "Now I am very secure," that is God... (break) ...Vṛndāvana, They were ministers in the government of Nawab Hussein Shah. But when they lived in Vṛndāvana, about their life it is stated by Śrīnivāsa Ācārya, nidrāhāra-vihārakādi-vijitau **. These things, nidrā, āhāra, vihāra. Nidrā means sleeping, āhāra means eating and vihāra means sense gratification. So nidrāhāra-vihārakādi-vijitau, conquered. Conquer. We have to conquer. This is called jitendriya.

Everyone wants money, everyone wants good wife, good family, good comfortable life. Caitanya Mahāprabhu denies, that "I don't want all these things."
Lecture on SB 1.5.1-4 -- New Vrindaban, May 22, 1969:

So Nārada will give the hint what is the final puruṣārtha. That final puruṣārtha is Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam. Not that even if we become liberated, if we merge into the existence of the Absolute, oh, that is also not final. Therefore in the Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam you'll find in the beginning that dharmaḥ projjhita-kaitavo' tra (SB 1.1.2). These four principles of our interest, means dharma-artha-kāma-mokṣa, projjhita, they are thrown away from this Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam. And the great commenter, commentator, I mean to say, Śrīdhara Svāmī, he says that dharmaḥ projjhita-dharma-artha-kāma-mokṣa atra mokṣa-visandhir(?) api parityaktaḥ. One should not aspire even for liberation. That is the position of a devotee.

Just like Caitanya Mahāprabhu says, na dhanaṁ na janaṁ na sundarīṁ kavitāṁ vā jagadīśa kāmaye (Cc. Antya 20.29, Śikṣāṣṭaka 4). These are dharma-artha. Anyone wants... Everyone wants money, everyone wants good wife, good family, good comfortable life. Caitanya Mahāprabhu denies, that "I don't want all these things." Na dhanaṁ na janaṁ na sundarīṁ kavitāṁ vā jagadīśa kāmaye. Then that is... (break)

Oh, the bodily comforts are so many. I have got my car, I have got good apartment, I have got good wife, and... Why I am not happy?
Lecture on SB 1.5.2 -- Los Angeles, January 10, 1968:

So here Nārada is asking Vyāsadeva, jijñāsitam. "You are a very perfect scholar." Now the first word is used here, jijñāsitam. A scholar is he who has perfectly inquired from his spiritual master. Inquiry. Just like in the Vedānta-sūtra, the first aphorism is athāto brahma jijñāsā. One must be very inquisitive. That... I have explained already several times, that first inquisitiveness should be "What I am? Am I this body? Oh, the bodily comforts are so many. I have got my car, I have got good apartment, I have got good wife, and... Why I am not happy? Why I am not happy? Everything is there. So am I this body?" No. Vyāsadeva here is asked this question, jijñāsitam. So jijñāsitam adhītaṁ ca. Jijñāsitaṁ susampannam api: "And after inquiry, you have very nicely written all kinds of literature, authoritative literature."

Now we have got this electric fan, or air-conditioned room. So Yamarāja will not be able to enter, and I am secure. I have got good bank balance and good wife, good children..." No, no, no. This is illusion.
Lecture on SB 1.5.32 -- Vrndavana, August 13, 1974:

We are always suffering three kinds of suffering—adhyātmika, adhibhautika, adhidaivika—and we think, "Now we are very happy. Now we have got this electric fan, or air-conditioned room. So Yamarāja will not be able to enter, and I am secure. I have got good bank balance and good wife, good children..." No, no, no. This is illusion.

In the Bhāgavata it is said that we are depending, we are thinking, "I am sure." Why? "Now I have got very good wife. I am sure to live very peacefully or happily,"
Lecture on SB 1.7.36-37 -- Vrndavana, September 29, 1976:

Just like in this material world almost everyone, 99.9 percent, they are all pramattas. For example, pramattaḥ tasya nidhanaṁ paśyann api na paśyati. In the Bhāgavata it is said that we are depending, we are thinking, "I am sure." Why? "Now I have got very good wife. I am sure to live very peacefully or happily," or "I shall not die because I have got very good wife, faithful wife." Similarly, "I have got very good husband or very good friend," or "I am born in a very big nation." So on, so on. Security. Because security is a problem. Everyone in this material world, they have got four problems: how to eat, how to sleep, how to have sex, and how to become secure. Security. The animal is also working very hard for these four principles, and the man is also working very hard. That is common. But that is not security. "Because I have got very good means of living, very good means of sleeping, nice house, and very good wife and very good bank balance and good government, therefore I am secure." That is nonsense. Pramatta. That is called pramatta. Means he does not know that at any moment Yamarāja can come and kick him out from this position.

He is seeing every day that "This gentleman had a very good wife, this gentleman had very nice son, very good family—but they are dying."
Lecture on SB 1.7.36-37 -- Vrndavana, September 29, 1976:

He is seeing every day that "This gentleman had a very good wife, this gentleman had very nice son, very good family—but they are dying." So who will protect him? He's thinking that "My children, my wife, my friends will save me," but they have died. So how he will be protected?

Woman should be trained up from the very beginning how to become good wife and good mother.
Lecture on SB 1.7.43 -- Vrndavana, October 3, 1976:

if one has no mother at home and wife is apriya-vādinī, she talks very roughly, not very nicely, then that person immediately leave that home and go to the forest. Yathāraṇyaṁ tathā gṛham. For him, either at home or in the forest, the same thing. Yathāraṇyaṁ tathā gṛham. This is Vedic culture. Woman should be trained up from the very beginning how to become good wife and good mother. That is the duty. Vāma-svabhāvā. So here is example, Kuntīdevī is one example. Draupadī one example. We have got many examples how to train woman.

Everyone wants very comfortable life with good bank balance, good house, good wife, good children.
Lecture on SB 1.8.18-19 -- Bombay, April 9, 1971:

Everyone is samala. Samala, with dirty things. The karmī, jñānī, yogi, everyone is infected with dirty things. Why? The karmīs, they want that "I shall be elevated in the heavenly planet and I shall enjoy there in the Nandana-kānana, and beautiful wife, beautiful women." That is their ambition, the people are working very hard here. Everyone wants very comfortable life with good bank balance, good house, good wife, good children. That is their ambition. That is karmī. They have no other ambition. Similarly, jñānī. When the jñānī sees that his good wife, good family, good money, and good house is nonsense... "It will not stay, but for some years I can enjoy. Then it will be all vanquished." They are jñānīs. They know how things are happening. Therefore they want mukti.

We are thinking, "I am in the family life. I am very happy. I am very secure. I have got my good wife, I have got my good children, and so many things... I have got good bank balance. So I am secure."
Lecture on SB 1.8.26 -- Mayapura, October 6, 1974:

In another place it is said that we are thinking very secure: "I have got a nice body, stout and strong. I take daily exercise in the morning and I keep myself fit." Ataḥ... That verse is...? The...? Deha-kalatrādi. "I have got good wife..." Sainya means ātma-sainya, su, asatsu, ātmā... We are thinking, "I am in the family life. I am very happy. I am very secure. I have got my good wife, I have got my good children, and so many things... I have got good bank balance. So I am secure."

This is our soldier. "I have got a good body, strong body, and I have got my children, my grown-up boys. I have got very good wife."
Lecture on SB 1.8.26 -- Mayapura, October 6, 1974:

Just like Kuntī says, vipadaḥ santu śaśvat tāḥ. It is simply full of dangers. So when there is danger, we have to fight. That is material life. That is called struggle for existence. So how we are fighting? Dehāpatya-kalatrādiṣv ātma-sainyeṣu (SB 2.1.4). This is our soldier. "I have got a good body, strong body, and I have got my children, my grown-up boys. I have got very good wife." Ādi. This is the ādi. This is the beginning of thinking, "I have got..." Kiñcana. This is kiñcana, "I have got something." Dehāpatya-kalatrādiṣu. They are considered as ātma-sainya: "They are my soldiers. Whenever I am sick, they will help me. If I go out, then who will help me? If I leave my home, then if I fall sick, who will take care of me? No, no. I am not going out of home." Dehāpatya-kalatrādiṣv ātma-sainyeṣu. That is my soldier. We are fighting with the soldier, accompanied by soldier.

So when one becomes devotee of Lord Śiva, he gets material opulence. He becomes rich. He gets good wife.
Lecture on SB 1.8.26 -- Mayapura, October 6, 1974:

Lord Śiva means..., at least, he voluntarily accepts all poverty. His wife is Durgā devī, so powerful. Sṛṣṭi-sthiti-pralaya-sādhana-śaktir ekā (Bs. 5.44). She can make a new universe, she is so powerful. But this couple, Lord Śiva and Pārvatī, they have no house even to live. They live under the tree, so poor, no residential house even. So when one becomes devotee of Lord Śiva, he gets material opulence. He becomes rich. He gets good wife. He gets all material opulences. And when one becomes the devotee of Viṣṇu, the husband of goddess of fortune, he becomes poor.

There was good wife, young wife, most affectionate mother. So Caitanya Mahāprabhu could stay at His birthplace very nicely without any difficulty.
Lecture on SB 1.8.29 -- Mayapura, October 9, 1974:

Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu, certainly He took His birth here, but He did not remain here. He did not remain here. He could have remained here very easily. His influence was very great. He was known as Nimāi Paṇḍita, very learned scholar. Everyone knew. And He was very respectful. Otherwise, how He could gather 100,000 people in one day to go to the Kazi's house? That means He was very influential. But still, He... There was good wife, young wife, most affectionate mother. So Caitanya Mahāprabhu could stay at His birthplace very nicely without any difficulty. And what will be difficulty? He's Kṛṣṇa Himself, Nārāyaṇa Himself. And there was Lakṣmī. But still, to show the example personally, āpani ācari prabhu jīvere śikhāya, He left home, He took sannyāsa, and He preached.

Material opulence means riches and good wife.
Lecture on SB 1.8.43 -- Mayapura, October 23, 1974:

Now the Durgā Pūjā is going on. This is also recommended in the Vedic śāstra, that those who want material opulence... Material opulence means riches and good wife. For this purpose, śāstra recommends that you can worship Durgā. There are different purposes, and different demigod worships are recommended.

"I have got good wife. I have got children. They will save me." Nobody will save you, sir. When death will come, you have to give your own account.
Lecture on SB 1.15.37 -- Los Angeles, December 15, 1973:

For want of real knowledge, ātma-jñāna... First of all one has to learn actually what he is. Is he this body or something else? That is the beginning. But they do not know. He thinks that "I am body," deha. And because from this body, I have got relationship with my wife, "Oh, she is my great friend," and the children, "They are my soldiers. They will protect me." Dehāpatya-kalatrādiṣu ātma-sainyeṣu. He is very safe. "I have got good wife. I have got children. They will save me." Nobody will save you, sir. When death will come, you have to give your own account.

I have got my good brothers, good wife, good children, good influence, good dress, good food, everything good. Why should I give up?"
Lecture on SB 1.15.40 -- Los Angeles, December 18, 1973:

So at the present moment, Kali-yuga, it is very difficult to become perfectly realized soul, or Kṛṣṇa conscious. There are two methods. One method is voluntarily giving up all unwanted things. That is one method. Just like Mahārāja Yudhiṣṭhira is doing. He is the emperor, most opulent. His position is most exalted. There was nothing, material unhappiness, but still, voluntarily he is giving up. This is civilization. Not sticking to this, "Oh, I have got this emperor. I have got my good brothers, good wife, good children, good influence, good dress, good food, everything good. Why should I give up?" Nowadays even an ordinary post, just like elected post, say, for five years or three years, still, he will stick to that.

Raghunātha dāsa Gosvāmī, he made it in his life, during Caitanya Mahāprabhu's... Even after departure of Caitanya Mahāprabhu, about four hundred years ago. He was a very rich man's son. Very good wife, very good state.
Lecture on SB 1.16.6 -- Los Angeles, January 3, 1974:

Ask any scientist, philosopher, of this world, that "Can you show me any way, no more eating, no more sleeping, no more mating and no more defending?" That is spiritual life. Therefore we have to reduce it. It is not possible, but there is possibility. Just like Raghunātha dāsa Gosvāmī. Raghunātha dāsa Gosvāmī, he made it in his life, during Caitanya Mahāprabhu's... Even after departure of Caitanya Mahāprabhu, about four hundred years ago. He was a very rich man's son. Very good wife, very good state. He left everything, and ultimately, he made these things, even eating, nil. He was eating every third day a small quantity of butter, nominal, little. Otherwise he gave up eating. So it is possible.

In a family where there is good mother and good wife, that is happy family.
Lecture on SB 1.16.21 -- Los Angeles, July 11, 1974:

But still, Caitanya Mahāprabhu, Vaiṣṇava, para-duḥkha-duḥkhī... That is stated in the Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam. Tyaktvā su-dustyaja-surepsita-rājya-lakṣmīṁ dharmiṣṭha ārya-vacasā yad agād araṇyam (SB 11.5.34). He had no business to take sannyāsa at very young age, only twenty-four years old, such nice family, good wife, mother. In a family where there is good mother and good wife, that is happy family. And one who has no good mother and good wife, then it is hell. This is Vedic culture. So Cāṇakya Paṇḍita said, mātā yasya gṛhe nāsti. If somebody has no mother at home, bhāryā cāpriya-vādinī, and the wife is very harsh, dealing with the husband not very properly, araṇyaṁ tena gantavyam, he immediately give up that house and go to the forest.

Just like Parīkṣit Mahārāja is preparing. "At that time, all these, my soldiers, my bank balance, my good wife, my good children, my good countrymen—no. Nobody can give me any protection."
Lecture on SB 2.1.1-5 -- Boston, December 22, 1969:

Just like Parīkṣit Mahārāja is preparing. "At that time, all these, my soldiers, my bank balance, my good wife, my good children, my good countrymen—no. Nobody can give me any protection." Just like when you have to fly in the sky, you have to protect yourself.

Icchatābhayam, those who are actually seeking protection. Not this protection, that your bank balance, your good wife, this and... No. They will not give you protection.
Lecture on SB 2.1.1-5 -- Boston, December 22, 1969:

Icchatābhayam, those who are actually seeking protection. Not this protection, that your bank balance, your good wife, this and... No. They will not give you protection. So Parīkṣit Mahārāja was advised by Śukadeva Gosvāmī, his spiritual master, "This is your business at the point of death." So not only at the point of death. You cannot take to this business all of a sudden, even it is advised. You have to practice. Just like you cannot become a good soldier on the battlefield. You have to be trained yourself before going to the battle, military training. So this Kṛṣṇa consciousness movement is training before you ultimately meet death, fight with.

I am thinking, "Now I have got good home, good wife, nice children, nice bank balance. So I am safe now." No, sir, you are not safe.
Lecture on SB 2.1.3 -- Paris, June 12, 1974:

Anyway, even though we are able to maintain a very nice group of family members, then I may be puffed up that "I am maintaining such a nice family," but that is also not very good situation. Dehāpatya-kalatrādiṣu. I am thinking, "Now I have got good home, good wife, nice children, nice bank balance. So I am safe now." No, sir, you are not safe. Dehāpatya-kalatrādiṣv ātma-sainyeṣu (SB 2.1.4). This world is struggle for existence. You should not think that because you have got nice wife, children, and nice nationality, or everything nice... Still, you are not safe. This is to be understood. Yes. Just like Napoleon in your country, he had many soldiers. He was fighting. He was conquering all over. And because he had very, very good military strength, he was thinking he was safe. But he was also defeated, and he had to die also, leaving all the opulences he created. So nobody's safe. You must always remember that. So here it is said, dehāpatya-kalatrādiṣv ātma-sainyeṣv asatsv api (SB 2.1.4). Although I know that this national strength, or this material strength, the bank balance strength and good wife and everything is there, but they'll not be able to save me. This is the intelligence.

Everyone is thinking that "I have got my good wife. I have got very nice children. I have got my nice society, nation," and so on, so many.
Lecture on SB 2.1.4 -- Vrndavana, March 19, 1974:

those who are not very intelligent to see about the truth of ātmā, they are entangled. How it is entangle...? Now, deha-apatya. This body and the offspring, children, born out of this body through the wife, dehāpatya-kalatrādiṣu ātma-sainyeṣu. Everyone is thinking that "I have got my good wife. I have got very nice children. I have got my nice society, nation," and so on, so many. Dehāpatya-kalatrādiṣu. And he's thinking that "They are my soldiers." Here is this fight, struggle for existence. Everyone is struggling to exist, and everyone is thinking, "They are my soldiers. These, my wife, children, society, friendship, nation, they'll give me protection." But nobody can give protection.

Take example, your President Kennedy. He approached to the most happiest position, president, young man, good wife, children. Within a second, everything finished.
Lecture on SB 5.5.2 -- Boston, April 28, 1969:

Therefore the qualifications of this material world are two. It is full of misery and it is temporary. But our demand is full of pleasure and eternal life. Just opposite. But the foolish persons, they do not understand. They think, "Oh, we are very much happy." Oh. How we are happy? Supposing you are feeling happy. How long you'll be happy? Any moment you'll have to give up this place. Take example, your President Kennedy. He approached to the most happiest position, president, young man, good wife, children. Within a second, everything finished. Within a second. He was going on car very nicely, protected, thinking protection, but just in a moment—finished. So that possibility is for everyone. Even the President of America, Mr. Kennedy, he could not save himself, in spite of so much power and opulence. And what of us?

So one brāhmaṇa blessed Him, "My dear boy, You'll be very happy in your family life. You'll have good wife, very opulent position."
Lecture on SB 5.6.6 -- Vrndavana, November 28, 1976:

Caitanya Mahāprabhu, to receive some blessings from the brāhmaṇas, when He was boy He was voluntarily trying to give some service to the brāhmaṇas who were engaged in bathing in the Ganges. He'll clear the place because the brāhmaṇa, after taking bath in the Ganges, would sit down, would chant mantra. So He'll cleanse and He'll wash the cloth, and in... Voluntarily He was doing that, service. So one brāhmaṇa blessed Him, "My dear boy, You'll be very happy in your family life. You'll have good wife, very opulent position." And Caitanya Mahāprabhu was blocking the ears. The brāhmaṇa said, "What is this?" "No, this is not blessing, sir." "Oh, it is not blessing? Then You'll never be happy in Your family life." "Yes, this is the..." (laughter) "This is all right." So therefore He took sannyāsa.

People generally aspire for these three things: wealth, many followers, and a good wife at home.
Lecture on SB 6.1.6 -- Honolulu, June 8, 1975:

There are many businessmen, they are running on big factories and thousands of men are working at his direction. This is also opulence. And to have great amount of money, that is also opulence. Dhanaṁ janam. And another a opulence, to have a very nice wife, beautiful, obedient, very pleasing. So these are material necessities. People generally aspire for these three things: wealth, many followers, and a good wife at home. But Caitanya Mahāprabhu says, na dhanam: "I don't want money." Just the opposite.

So if there is no mother and there is no good wife, then araṇyaṁ tena gantavyam, immediately he should give up that home. Araṇyam: he should go to the forest.
Lecture on SB 6.1.8 -- Honolulu, May 9, 1976:

So Cāṇakya Paṇḍita says if the wife is not very attached and does not speak very well... Means does not like the husband on the whole. If such wife is at home and mother is not there... This is ideal Indian happy home. But in your country it is very rare, you see. But this is the standard of happiness. So if there is no mother and there is no good wife, then araṇyaṁ tena gantavyam, immediately he should give up that home. Araṇyam: he should go to the forest. "Why forest? In the city, I have got very nice home, nice building." No. For a person who has no good wife, neither mother, for him, yathāraṇyaṁ tathā gṛham. For him either this home or the forest, it is same.

If you want to marry, we shall give you good wife. What you want more? So come and live with us. That's all.
Lecture on SB 6.1.8-13 -- New York, July 24, 1971:

Our students, they are living with us. You simply come and live with us—you are free from all karma. Is it difficult? Then do that. We shall give you food, we shall give you shelter, we shall give you nice philosophy. If you want to marry, we shall give you good wife. What you want more? So come and live with us. That's all.

So in this way Ajāmila fell a victim of that prostitute. He liked that prostitute, and later on, he remained with her, and he had very good wife, very respectable family, brāhmaṇa, but he forgot everything.
Lecture on SB 6.1.21 -- Chicago, July 5, 1975:

So this Ajāmila was very nicely trained up, born of a brāhmaṇa father, and his father trained up. But unfortunately, when he was young man, he was passing through the road, he saw one śūdra is embracing another śūdrāṇī, or prostitute. Now it is very common affair all over the world: a man is embracing, kissing. But this was not allowed in gentlemen's society. The śūdras, the fourth-class man, they used to do that. Sometimes, not always. So he was young man. Naturally, when he saw that a young śūdra is embracing another young girl, śūdrāṇī, and she is not properly dressed, he became attracted. He became attracted. And they were drunk. So in this way he fell a victim of that prostitute. He liked that prostitute, and later on, he remained with her, and he had very good wife, very respectable family, brāhmaṇa, but he forgot everything. Therefore it is said, naṣṭa-sadācāraḥ: "He lost all brahminical qualification."

Those who are mad, they think that "My, this body, strong body," deha apatya, "my children, my grown up children," dehāpatya-kalatra, "my good wife," dehapātya-kalatrādiṣu, "and the by-products of this combination—wife, children, and bank balance."
Lecture on SB 6.1.27 -- Indore, December 15, 1970:

Those who are mad, they think that "My, this body, strong body," deha apatya, "my children, my grown up children," dehāpatya-kalatra, "my good wife," dehapātya-kalatrādiṣu, "and the by-products of this combination—wife, children, and bank balance." Just like one fights in the battlefield, you are simply fighting, struggle for existence within this material world, and our soldiers are these: my children, my wife, my relatives, my country, so on, so on. But Bhāgavata says pramatta, "he is mad"; teṣāṁ nidhanam, "he does not know that they will be all finished." Paśyann api na paśyati: "he does not see, although he is seeing." He has seen that his father was living, but he is no more: "He is not no more protecting me. Then how I shall protect my son, or how my son will protect me?"

I don't want any good wife, nice beautiful wife." "Then what do you want?" "I want to serve You. That's all." Finish your prayer. That is the best prayer.
Lecture on SB 7.9.12 -- Montreal, August 18, 1968:

Everyone is praying to God with some interest. That is also good. If you go and pray to God, "Give me some money" or "Give me some relief," "Give me a nice house, nice wife, nice foodstuff," that is also good. But not so good as one is praying to God that "I don't want any money. I don't want any number of followers. I don't want any good wife, nice beautiful wife." "Then what do you want?" "I want to serve You. That's all." Finish your prayer. That is the best prayer.

So Vaiṣṇava has no such ambition that "I must have multimillions and million of dollars to possess and must have a very good wife," na dhanam, "and many followers.
Lecture on SB 7.9.43 -- Calcutta, March 23, 1976:

So Vaiṣṇava has no such ambition that "I must have multimillions and million of dollars to possess and must have a very good wife," na dhanam, "and many followers. I shall become minister, leader, political." These ambitions are completely kicked out by the Vaiṣṇavas. They have no value.

But if he is unable to do that, the brahmacārī, the guru orders him, "All right, you take a good wife and be satisfied and have family life up to fifty years. Then you give it up."
Lecture on SB 7.9.46 -- Vrndavana, April 1, 1976:

Therefore it is recommended to, I mean to say, train the children to become brahmacārī. Brahmacārī. That means to control the senses. Brahmacārī gurukule vasan dāntaḥ. Dānta means controlling the senses. That is gurukula, how to teach the students to become controlling over their sense. And if he is perfect, then he doesn't require to accept gṛhastha āśrama. He can accept immediately sannyāsa āśrama. But if he is unable to do that, the brahmacārī, the guru orders him, "All right, you take a good wife and be satisfied and have family life up to fifty years. Then you give it up." Not that it is essential; one has to marry. This is a concession for sex life, that's all.

If one has got good wife, then he gets energy to work.
Lecture on SB 7th Canto -- Calcutta, March 7, 1972:

In the Bhagavad-gītā, Kṛṣṇa says that these material elements—earth, water, air, fire, mind, intelligence, ego—they are bhinnā me prakṛti aṣṭadhā (BG 7.4). Prakrti. He is puruṣa. Prakṛti means female. So they are also energy, energy. Just like here, try to understand, the karmīs, unless they have got a wife, they cannot work, they are not very enthusiastic. Therefore, according to the karmīs, when the boy is developed, immediately the parents get him wife for him. Otherwise he will be dull, he cannot work. Energy, śakti. If one has got good wife, then he gets energy to work. Therefore, prakṛti, she is called prakṛti, energy. Similarly, this is a fact. Kṛṣṇa has got also energy, the original puruṣa—Rādhārāṇī, energy, prakṛti. Kṛṣṇa is engladdened in the presence of Rādhārāṇī. That is nature. Similarly, a man, he becomes energized if he has got a good wife or good mother. This is the history of the whole world. Any great man in this world, you will find that behind him he has got a good wife or good mother. Prakṛti, energy. That energizes.

Nectar of Devotion Lectures

So generally, people, they like it—good family, good bank balance and good wife, good daughter, daughter-in-law.
The Nectar of Devotion -- Vrndavana, November 11, 1972:

Śrī means beauty, aiśvarya means wealth, and prajā means generation. So generally, people, they like it—good family, good bank balance and good wife, good daughter, daughter-in-law. If one family is consisting of beautiful women and riches and grea..., many children, he is supposed to be successful. He's supposed to be most successful man.

Sri Caitanya-caritamrta Lectures

Our subject matter is not material things, that somehow or other you get a car and a good apartment and a good wife, then all your problems solved. No. That is not solution of problems. The real problem is how to stop your death. That is the real problem.
Lecture on CC Madhya-lila 20.102 -- Baltimore, July 7, 1976:

Guru means one who has seen the Absolute Truth. That is guru. Tattva-darśinaḥ, tattva means the Absolute Truth, and darśinaḥ, one who has seen. So this movement, our Kṛṣṇa consciousness movement, is for this purpose, to see the Absolute Truth, to understand the Absolute Truth, to know the problems of life and how to make a solution. These things are our subject matter. Our subject matter is not material things, that somehow or other you get a car and a good apartment and a good wife, then all your problems solved. No. That is not solution of problems. The real problem is how to stop your death. That is the real problem.

Arrival Addresses and Talks

The modern civilization, everyone is thinking, "If I get a good wife and nice motorcar and a nice apartment, that is success."
Arrival Lecture -- Miami, February 25, 1975:

Out of many thousands, millions people, one is anxious to make his life successful. Nobody is interested. Practically they do not know what is actually success of life. The modern civilization, everyone is thinking, "If I get a good wife and nice motorcar and a nice apartment, that is success." That is not success. That is temporary. Real success is to get out of the clutches of māyā, means this material conditional life which comprehends birth, death, old age and disease.

Initiation Lectures

A man is considered to be fortunate in three ways. If he has got good wife then he is fortunate.
Initiation of Rukmini Dasi -- Montreal, August 15, 1968:

Lakṣmī. The beautiful girls are called goddess of fortune. Actually, woman is considered as goddess of fortune, representative of goddess of fortune. We are misusing for sense gratification. No. They should be respected as goddess of fortune. If one man has got nice wife, actually he has got goddess of fortune. That is astrological calculation. A man is considered to be fortunate in three ways. If he has got good wife then he is fortunate. If he has got good son then he is fortunate. And if he has got plenty money he is fortunate. So these three standards of fortune, out of which, one who has got good wife, he is the most fortunate. So our society will try to make good wives so that the boys, all boys, should, can think himself always fortunate. If one has got good wife, any place, doesn't matter. Either under... Just like Lord Śiva, he was living underneath the tree. There is no shelter, but he had the good wife, Pārvatī, so he was happy. So whenever you like, we shall select any brahmacārī. But don't have illicit sex. Marriage is allowed. I take personally care of marriage. I want this society must be cleansed. Without being cleansed, nobody can advance in spiritual consciousness.

So popularity, born in high family, having good wife and good mother, everything complete—still, He took sannyāsa.
Gurudasa Sannyasa Initiation -- San Francisco, July 21, 1975:

And Caitanya Mahāprabhu's learning, nobody could excel Him, He was so learned scholar. And when He was sixteen years old, He defeated one of the most learned scholar of India, Keśava Bhāratī. So learning, family... And wife? Personally goddess of fortune, Lakṣmīpriyā and Viṣṇupriyā, most beautiful and young. Viṣṇupriyā was His second wife, so faithful, so beautiful, personally goddess of fortune, such wife. And mother, most affectionate. There is no comparison with Śacī-mātā. So this was... And influence? When He was twenty years old, He could, by His command, gather 100,000 people to protest against Kazi, He was so popular. So popularity, born in high family, having good wife and good mother, everything complete—still, He took sannyāsa.

General Lectures

Just like a man is very happy in his family life... He has good house, good wife, good children, and good bank balance, enjoying life, but śāstra says, "No. You are fifty years old; you must get out."
Lecture -- London, September 16, 1969:

Similarly, the knowledge is covered of the small particle Brahman, not of the Supreme Brahman. There are many instances. So some way or other, our knowledge is now covered in this material existence, so we have to get out of this ignorance. For that purpose we require tapasya, tapo divyam (SB 5.5.1). Tapasya means voluntarily accepting some inconveniences. Voluntarily... Just like a man is very happy in his family life... He has good house, good wife, good children, and good bank balance, enjoying life, but śāstra says, "No. You are fifty years old; you must get out." So he has to get out.

Philosophy Discussions

Durgā is giving whatever the demon wants. "Give me money. Give me good wife. Give me reputation. Give me strength."
Philosophy Discussion on Gottfried Wilhelm von Leibnitz:

Prabhupāda: That's it. Yes. All the laws of nature are working (indistinct). The body is durgā, the superintendent of the fort. This is called durgā. Just like fort is very much fortified; you cannot go; they say nobody can enter, nobody can leave, like that. This is called durgā. And the superintendent is called Durgā. From durgā it has come to Durgā. She is also confidential maidservant of Kṛṣṇa, but she has got (indistinct) to punish these demons. Demon is (indistinct), that I worship his mother, but mother is engaged to punish him because (indistinct). She is giving whatever the demon wants. "Give me money. Give me good wife. Give me reputation. Give me strength." "All right," but at the same time everything is frustrated with this (indistinct). Two things are going on. One thing, that whatever he wants he is given: "I will get it." On the other side, punishment. This is nature's flow, and she is doing this under the instruction of Kṛṣṇa.

Conversations and Morning Walks

1968 Conversations and Morning Walks

If one has got very good mother, one has got very good wife, and one has got very good son, then his homely life is heaven.
Questions and Answers -- Montreal, August 26, 1968:

Prabhupāda: Rājya-lakṣmīn means very happy home, home life, homely life. That is called rājya-lakṣmīn—one who is very happy at home. And the symptom of happiness at home, according to Vedic understanding, is the mother, wife and son. If one has got very good mother, one has got very good wife, and one has got very good son, then his homely life is heaven. That is the standard of happiness.

Young man, having good mother, good wife, good home, good reputation, good following, good parentage, beauty—everything—but He renounced.
Questions and Answers -- Montreal, August 26, 1968:

Prabhupāda: So Caitanya Mahāprabhu, this is one of the brilliant examples of opulence, that He renounced His so happy family life, not disturbing life, and very, at a very young age, when everyone is after enjoying family life. So is it not a great opulence? Very great opulence. Young man, having good mother, good wife, good home, good reputation, good following, good parentage, beauty—everything—but He renounced. That is the greatest opulence. He renounced everything for Kṛṣṇa.

1971 Conversations and Morning Walks

Kardama Muni, he was a great yogi. So he was thinking of marrying, so Kṛṣṇa sent him good wife, Devahūti, a king's daughter.
Darsana -- June 28, 1971, San Francisco:

Prabhupāda: Kardama Muni, he was a great yogi. So he was thinking of marrying, so Kṛṣṇa sent him good wife, Devahūti, a king's daughter. So he thought, "I was thinking of marrying, so Kṛṣṇa has sent. All right, let me marry." But he made a condition to her father that "I can accept your daughter as my wife so long she has no children. As soon as she has children, I shall go away." So the father agreed, "Whatever you like, you can do. I'm just placing my wife in your custody." So the sannyāsī..., when there is a child of the wife, I think one can accept sannyāsa.

1972 Conversations and Morning Walks

In India still in village you'll find a man with practically no income but he has got his happy home, good wife, a cottage, little bread, but he is happy.
Room Conversation and Interview with Ian Polsen -- July 31, 1972, London:

Prabhupāda: Material advancement will never make us happy, that's a fact. People have not become happy. In India they say that we neglected this material side therefore. But actually that is not the fact. They have lost their own spiritual culture; therefore they are not... But still, whatever spiritual culture they have got, still they are happier than others, if I make comparative study. In India still in village you'll find a man with practically no income but he has got his happy home, good wife, a cottage, little bread, but he is happy. Here I see they have no home, no family life. Even ordinary necessities of life means eating, sleeping, sex life and defense. They have no fixed-up eating. In America, in the Bowery street, lying down on the street, drinking. So many. Here also in your country. Day and night, in India they are lying, suppose they are poverty stricken, lying on the street. Now why you are lying on the street? When I go to the park I see so many there.

1973 Conversations and Morning Walks

He has good wife, good children, all favorable for Kṛṣṇa consciousness.
Room Conversation with Indian Guests -- July 11, 1973, London:

Guest (9): He is lucky. For some of them, half of them, they go here, half of them go there.

Prabhupāda: He has good wife, good children, all favorable for Kṛṣṇa consciousness. He does not...

Guest (8): This is Prabhupāda's mercy really.

1975 Conversations and Morning Walks

A man who hasn't affectionate mother at home, neither very good wife, so he should immediately give up that home and go to the forest.
Morning Walk -- June 28, 1975, Denver:

Prabhupāda: A man who hasn't affectionate mother at home, neither very good wife, so he should immediately give up that home and go to the forest because for him it is as good, either you remain in forest or in home.

Position is if you can get a bungalow like this, and two cars, good wife, then life is successful. Is it not?
Morning Walk -- September 26, 1975, Ahmedabad:

Prabhupāda: ...position is if you can get a bungalow like this, and two cars, good wife, then life is successful. Is it not?

Kartikeya: Yes.

Prabhupāda: "Never mind I am going to be a dog next life."

Kartikeya: They are not knowing anything today. They continue to live as it is.

1976 Conversations and Morning Walks

Yes. He had very good wife, young wife, and he became a victim to a prostitute and lost all brahminical culture.
Morning Walk -- January 21, 1976, Mayapura:

Tamāla Kṛṣṇa: Like Ajāmila. Ajāmila.

Prabhupāda: Yes. He had very good wife, young wife, and he became a victim to a prostitute and lost all brahminical culture. So if you create prostitute in the society, where is the hope of brahminical culture?

If you worship Durga, then you pray, "Mother Durga, give me name, fame, wealth, good wife, and so on, so on."
Answers to a Questionnaire from Bhavan's Journal -- June 28, 1976, Vrndavana:

Prabhupāda: Those who are worshiper of demigods, they are lusty. Kāmuka. And the kāmuka platform is material world, lusty. Everyone is trying to enjoy sense gratification. So demigod worship is for sense gratification. If you worship Durga, then you pray, "Mother Durga, give me name, fame, wealth, good wife, and so on, so on."

And I have seen, you are fortunate enough that you have got good wife and good children.
Room Conversation with Pandita from Tirupati and Government Minister -- August 24, 1976, Hyderabad:

Prabhupāda: This is the very easiest method. Chant Hare Kṛṣṇa mahā-mantra. Sit down as much time as you can devote. The Lord is at your home. It is a great fortune. So do this, both, all family together. Yes. And I have seen, you are fortunate enough that you have got good wife and good children. That is a great fortune. Nobody is against you. Everyone is favorable. Oh, that's a great opportunity.

Now how is this (indistinct) because the bride and bridegroom is selected by the parents.
Room Conversation -- December 26, 1976, Bombay:

Indian man: If a boy was not trained there he could not find a good wife.

Prabhupāda: Ācchā.

Indian man: That was a part of his qualification to get a good wife.

Prabhupāda: Now how is this (indistinct) because the bride and bridegroom is selected by the parents.

Indian man: Yes, the parents would not select that boy.

Prabhupāda: Oh.

1977 Conversations and Morning Walks

Therefore doctor became fortunate. He got very good wife.
Room Conversations -- February 20, 1977, Mayapura:

Prabhupāda: No, I was not traveling. The wife was traveling.

Tamāla Kṛṣṇa: His wife?

Prabhupāda: Yes. Therefore doctor became fortunate. He got very good wife.

One who has the tendency to enjoy this material world, and they are taking advantage of God, "Give me good wife, give me good work, good meal, good enjoyment," they are not in the bhakti line.
Conversation: Vairagya, Salaries, and Political Etiquette -- April 28, 1977, Bombay:

Prabhupāda: Niṣkiñcanasya. One who has decided that "This world is useless. I have to take birth repeatedly and accept different types of bodies and suffer." Body means... Those who have understood this fact and disgusted, so bhakti line is for them. One who has the tendency to enjoy this material world, and they are taking advantage of God, "Give me good wife, give me good work, good meal, good enjoyment," they are not in the bhakti line. They are in the very nascent stage.

Page Title:Good wife (Lectures and Conversations)
Compiler:Alakananda, Sureshwardas
Created:05 of Aug, 2010
Totals by Section:BG=0, SB=0, CC=0, OB=0, Lec=40, Con=13, Let=0
No. of Quotes:53