Duty of the parents

Expressions researched:
"duty of the parents" |"duty of the parent" |"duty of the individual parents"

SB Canto 3

To take care of the child is the primary duty of the parents because if such care is taken, society will be filled with good population to maintain the peace and prosperity of the society, country and human race

SB 3.31.5, Purport: Since the child depends completely on the assimilated foodstuff of the mother, during pregnancy there are restrictions on the food taken by the mother. Too much salt, chili, onion and similar food is forbidden for the pregnant mother because the child's body is too delicate and new for him to tolerate such pungent food. Restrictions and precautions to be taken by the pregnant mother, as enunciated in the smrti scriptures of Vedic literature, are very useful. We can understand from the Vedic literature how much care is taken to beget a nice child in society. The garbhadhana ceremony before sexual intercourse was compulsory for persons in the higher grades of society, and it is very scientific. Other processes recommended in the Vedic literature during pregnancy are also very important. To take care of the child is the primary duty of the parents because if such care is taken, society will be filled with good population to maintain the peace and prosperity of the society, country and human race.

Bhagavad-gita As It Is Lectures

Therefore according to Vedic civilization, it is the duty of the parents to get the sons and daughters married so that they will have family attraction, they will be established, they will be organized, things will go nicely

Lecture on BG 1.32-35 -- London, July 25, 1973: So Arjuna's description of this means bodily concept of life. The sum and substance of this whole passage described by Arjuna, kim no rajyena govinda kim bhogair jivitena va [Bg. 1.32]. Everyone works so hard to acquire money. Why? The family attraction. We were student of economics and there was a book, Marshall's Economics. That Mr. Marshall is explaining that economic impetus begins from family affection, family affection. Unless one has got family, he will not try to earn. He will not try to earn money. He will be irresponsible. Therefore it is essential. When one is given some responsible post... Some... I know some English firm in India, I had some connection with him. So he was simply trying to know, "The man who is going to work for us, whether he is family man?" Because unless he is a family man, he has no attraction. He can give up the job at any moment. Because there is no family attraction. This is the psychology. Therefore according to Vedic civilization, it is the duty of the parents to get the sons and daughters married so that they will have family attraction, they will be established, they will be organized, things will go nicely. If there is no family attraction, no responsibility, then the things will not go nicely. This is the basic principle.

So it is the duty of the state, duty of the parents, duty of the guardians, duty of the husband, duty of the father—everyone's duty is how to elevate a living creature who has got this fortunate human form of life to understand this paramāṁ gatim, highest perfection of life

Lecture on BG 8.20-22 -- New York, November 18, 1966: So aradhito yadi haris tapasa tatah kim. Naradhito yadi haris tapasa tatah kim: [Narada-pancaratra] "One who reaches there, for him, all kinds of penances, austerities -- no more required. And one who does not reach that place, all these austerities, penances -- useless, simply waste of time." So this should be the aim of human life. Human civilization, human society, should be so formed that they should have the opportunity. The human form of life is the opportunity to get this boon. So it is the duty of the state, duty of the parents, duty of the guardians, duty of the husband, duty of the father -- everyone's duty is how to elevate a living creature who has got this fortunate human form of life to understand this paramam gatim, highest perfection of life. That should be the mode of thing. Simply have some eating and sleeping and mating and some defense and quarreling like cats and dogs -- this is not civilization. The human civilization is this, that he should properly utilize this human form of life and take advantage of this knowledge and prepare himself in Krsna consciousness so that always, twenty-four hours, cent percent, he will be absorbed in Krsna and at the time of death at once transferred there. This should be the process of life. Therefore we have taken this movement, Krsna consciousness. Join us. Cooperate with us.

A man should not desire to become a father and the woman should not desire to become a mother unless both of them have taken the vow that "I shall beget a child and stop his cycle of birth and death." This is the duty of the parents

Lecture on BG 16.10 -- Hawaii, February 6, 1975: Therefore sastra says that pita na sa syaj janani na sa syat, na mocayed yah samupeta-mrtyum. A man should not desire to become a father and the woman should not desire to become a mother unless both of them have taken the vow that "I shall beget a child and stop his cycle of birth and death." This is the duty of the parents, not that "I shall beget children like cats and dogs." There should be some meaning of the life. Samupeta-mrtyum. Because we have got the circumstances, unclean body, because we have got unclean body, therefore there is birth and death. Just like as soon as you are infected, there is fever, similarly, the birth and death is a kind of disease. It is also listed with disease. Janma-mrtyu-jara-vyadhi [Bg. 13.9]. They are on the same category: birth, death, old age and disease. They are on the same category. But we take care of two things, namely old age... We try to remain young by cosmetic, but that is not possible. Similarly, we want to live forever. The lady doctor was (saying), "Yes, we can extend little more." Then what...? After all, you have to die. Extend little more or little less, you cannot avoid death.

Srimad-Bhagavatam Lectures

A child is suffering, he does not know how to get relief; so one should take care. They should be given shelter, they should be given cloth, food. It is the duty of the parents

Lecture on SB 5.5.32 -- Vrndavana, November 19, 1976: So varieties of life and varieties of position, you cannot change them. That is not possible. So the theory is humanitarianism, daridra-narayana-seva... Seva. It is not seva. A poor man, you can have mercy, daya. That is allowed. Just like we distribute prasadam. That is balisesu Isvare tad-adhinesu balisesu dvisatsu ca, prema-maitri-krpa upeksa. Krpa. Those who are suffering -- innocent, they do not know how to get release from the suffering -- they are called balisa. Just like a child. A child is suffering, he does not know how to get relief; so one should take care. They should be given shelter, they should be given cloth, food. It is the duty of the parents. That is natural. So for the balisa, innocent, it is our duty to show them mercy, give them food, give them shelter, give them instruction of Krsna consciousness so that he may understand why he is here in this material world, why he is suffering. Ke ami kene amaya jape tapa traya. Everyone is suffering threefold miserable condition of life, adhyatmika, adhibhautika, adhidaivika.

It is the duty of the guru, the duty of the parents, duty of the government to train people in such a way that they may become pious, sinless

Lecture on SB 6.1.19 -- Honolulu, May 19, 1976: So in the Kali-yuga, this age, there is no such king. There is no such government. Therefore people are becoming polluted. It is the duty of the guru, the duty of the parents, duty of the government to train people in such a way that they may become pious, sinless. But they do not believe, even in the next life, that "If we act impiously, then we have to suffer next life." They avoid to believe that there is next life. But there is next life. In the morning we were talking about this. How you can say there is no next life? The child has got next life: a boy. The boy has got next life: a young man. And the young man has next life, to become old man. Similarly, the old man has got next life. It is very common logic. And it is spoken by Krsna, the supreme authority. Even if you do not understand, your dull brain, but we have to accept the words of Krsna. That is the critical point. If we take Krsna's instruction, everything will be solved. There will be no problem.

Rather, killing their children in the womb. This is Kali-yuga. Whereas it is the duty of the parents how to save the child or the son from the clutches of death, they are now killing. This is advanced civilization

Lecture on SB 6.2.5-6 -- Vrndavana, September 9, 1975: So we are eternal spiritual spark. Krsna says that the living entity is eternal. Nityah sasvato 'yam, na hanyate hanyamane sarire [Bg. 2.20]. This is the information we get from the authority, that "The living entity is eternal," nitya, sasvata, "and ever-existing, and does not die on the death or annihilation of the body." Then what is the duty of the father? What is the duty of the government? Duty of the guru? Now how to save him from this repetition of birth and death. And that is the duty. Otherwise to give some food... That also, people cannot give now. Rather, killing their children in the womb. This is Kali-yuga. Whereas it is the duty of the parents how to save the child or the son from the clutches of death, they are now killing. This is advanced civilization. This is going on all over the world. They are going to the medical man and taking help and killing the child within the womb. This is Kali-yuga.

And it is the duty of the parents to train the children in such a way they get liberty in this very life. Father, mother, they should think of their innocent children, that "This boy, this child has come to us. Now let us train him in such a way that he will get liberty, no more birth and death

Lecture on SB 7.6.9 -- New Vrindaban, June 25, 1976: So the training should be how to give up this idea, and it is possible. If training is there, then it is possible. That is the instruction of Prahlada Maharaja: kaumara acaret prajno dharman bhagavatan iha [SB 7.6.1]. From the very beginning, children should be trained up in this line. That is the responsibility actually, father's, mother's affection. But the father-mother do not know what is the aim of life. Neither they are trained up. How they can train up their children? But here is the prescription how to train up. So in this age, although it is a very difficult task, at least if we teach our children to chant Hare Krsna maha-mantra, then everything is possible. That is the facility of this age. He'll be gradually trained up to the highest perfection. Caitanya Mahaprabhu's benediction is there: yaha haite sarva siddhi haibe tomara. Simply by chanting Hare Krsna mantra, you'll get all perfection of life. So either... Narottama dasa Thakura sings, grhe va vanete thake, "ha gauranga" bole dake. So don't be afraid that because we are in this age we cannot be trained up, it is very difficult. But we can very easily chant Hare Krsna maha-mantra. That is a special concession of this age. Just like these children were dancing and chanting. And it is the duty of the parents to train the children in such a way they get liberty in this very life. Father, mother, they should think of their innocent children, that "This boy, this child has come to us. Now let us train him in such a way that he will get liberty, no more birth and death." This is real responsibility of father and mother. Pita na sa syaj janani na sa syat, guru... Everyone's duty should be how to give relief to the living entities from these clutches of birth and death. That is ideal civilization.

Wedding Ceremonies

It is the duty of the parents to see that the girl and the boy is married by the supervision of the parents. That is the Vedic way of civilization

Wedding Ceremonies, Boston, May 6, 1969: So this Krsna consciousness movement is not a new movement. It is there always in the Vedic scriptures, but people have forgotten. So we are trying to revive that movement, although in India the movement is there always, especially since the last five hundred years, introduced by Lord Caitanya Mahaprabhu. In your country it is introduced since 1966. But people are appreciating. We have got many books and literature, magazines, to convince people about the importance of this movement. And those who are coming to be a serious student of this movement, initiated, they require to follow four principles of regulation. That one, first regulation, is that the student is not allowed to have illicit sex life. In this country, the guardians, the teachers, the government allows the boys and girls to meet together and have illicit sex life without marriage. That is not allowed in Krsna consciousness movement. If any boy or girl wants sex life, then he should regularly be married. That is civilized way. Because in the civilized society there is marriage ceremony. According to Vedic system, the father and mother's responsibility is for the child unless they are married. It is the duty of the parents to see that the girl and the boy is married by the supervision of the parents. That is the Vedic way of civilization.

General Lectures

Similarly, as we give material education to the children, it is the duty of the parents to enlighten them with spiritual education

Lecture Excerpt -- Los Angeles, January 13, 1969:: So in the Srimad-Bhagavatam also it is stated that parabhavas tavad abodha-jatah. We are all born ignorant. Either in human society or in animal society, we are born all ignorant. Therefore, in the human society the system is that children are given education. Why? Because it is supposed that the child is born ignorant. Similarly, as we give material education to the children, it is the duty of the parents to enlighten them with spiritual education. Srimad-Bhagavata says that "Nobody should desire to become a father, nobody should desire to become a mother, unless one is able to save the child from the impending death." So that is also the duty of spiritual master. One should not become a spiritual master unless one is able to save the disciple from impending death. And what is that impending death? Impending death means... Because we are spirit soul, we have no death. But impending death means of this body. So it is the duty of spiritual master, it is the duty of the parents, it is the duty of the state, it is the duty of kinsmen, friends, everyone, to save people from this impending birth and death.

Therefore it is the duty of a spiritual master, it is the duty of the parents, that they should enlighten their dependents to Kṛṣṇa consciousness

General Lectures, Los Angeles, January 13, 1969: Therefore it is the duty of a spiritual master, it is the duty of the parents, that they should enlighten their dependents to Krsna consciousness. If one becomes fully Krsna conscious, the simple factor, then he is saved from this material existence, or accepting repeated birth and death. Bhutva bhutva praliyate [Bg. 8.19]. Here, everything in the material world, everything is born, it remains for some time, it grows then dwindles then vanishes. So this is not very desirable. But unfortunately, the modern civilization, they do not know. They are very much proud of advancement of knowledge, but they do not know that the cause of suffering is this body. They do not know. And they do not know how to make a solution of this material existence.

Actually the students, the children, should be given chance to become Kṛṣṇa conscious. That is the duty of the state, that is the duty of the parents, that is the duty of the guru, that is the duty of kinsmen

Pandal Lecture -- Delhi, November 12, 1971:: This Krsna Consciousness Movement is to be learned from the very childhood. So far personally we are concerned, my father taught me this Krsna consciousness from the very childhood. My father was a great Vaisnava, and I had the opportunity of taking birth in that family. So he gave me lessons of this Krsna consciousness from the very beginning of my life. He gave me mrdanga. He engaged a teacher for learning mrdanga playing. Sometimes my mother was irritated. But somehow or other, I got the inspiration from my father worshiping a small Radha-Krsna Deity. So Prahlada Maharaja says, kaumara acaret prajno dharman bhagavatan iha [SB 7.6.1]. Actually the students, the children, should be given chance to become Krsna conscious. That is the duty of the state, that is the duty of the parents, that is the duty of the guru, that is the duty of kinsmen. That is the instruction given in the Srimad-Bhagavatam. Gurur na sa syat sva-jano na sa syat, pita na sa syaj janani na sa syat, na mocayed yah samupeta-mrtyum. This human form of life, as Prahlada Maharaja says, durlabham manusam janma. Durlabham manusam janma tad apy adhruvam arthadam. This human form of life is obtained after many, many millions and millions of births, evolutionary process. We have already discussed this point. So that is the Vedic civilization, that a human being should be given chance to understand this Bhagavata-dharma, Krsna consciousness. Krsna consciousness means Bhagavata-dharma.

The effect of education should be peaceful mind, peaceful living. That is the duty of the parents, of the guardians, of the government

University Lecture -- Calcutta, January 29, 1973:: So I wanted to recite some stanzas from Srimad-Bhagavatam, but there is no very much time. Long, long years ago, the father of Maharaja Bharata, under whose name this planet is called Bharatavarsa, so he instructed: nayam deho deha-bhajam nrloke kastan kaman arhati vid-bhujam ye [SB 5.5.1]. Here is the Fifth Canto of Srimad-Bhagavatam. Nayam deho deha-bhajam nrloke kastan kaman arhati vid-bhujam ye. This human form of life, ayam deha... Ayam deha nrloke: "in the human society." This is not meant for working very hard like the dogs and hogs. Kastan kaman arhati vid-bhujam ye. Simply by working hard, day and night, for sense gratification, this is done by the dogs and hogs. This is not meant for the human society. But, but at the present moment, people are being instructed in such a way... I've seen so many -- especially in Calcutta -- so many educated boys and girls, they are hankering after service. Day and night they are working. This is not the effect of education. The effect of education should be peaceful mind, peaceful living. That is the duty of the parents, of the guardians, of the government. When there is monarchical government... We see from the reign of Prthu Maharaja. He was seeing that every brahmana is engaged in his occupational duty, every ksatriya is employed, is engaged in occupational duty. Similarly vaisya. There was no question of unemployment. That is the first duty of the government to see. Neither there is division of the brahmanas, ksatriyas, vaisya, sudra, although it is made by Krsna Himself: catur-varnyam maya srstam guna-karma-vibhagasah [Bg. 4.13]. There have been so many anomalies in the society for want of this Vedic culture. Now here is the opportunity. People are accepting Krsna consciousness movement very nicely. You can introduce this Vedic culture throughout the whole world. They're receiving.

1968 Correspondence

It is the duty of the parents to see that the children are growing luxuriantly not only materially, but spiritually also. So spiritual training should be given from the very beginning

Letter to Dayananda, Nandarani -- Montreal 24 August, 1968: Regarding your question: "What is the correct sexual etiquette for a strict Grhastha; and what is spiritual family planning? Unless one wants to beget a child, there should not be any sex life. The best thing is to forget sex, but it is not possible immediately or all of a sudden, especially in the Western countries where sex life is so liberal. So under the circumstances, one should try to have sex life only for children, not for any other purpose. Spiritual family planning is that one should be determined to train up children in Krishna Consciousness. According to Bhagavata, the spiritual family planning is that one should not become a father or one should not become a mother, unless he is able to maintain their children to the extent of liberation. It is the duty of the parents to see that the children are growing luxuriantly not only materially, but spiritually also. So spiritual training should be given from the very beginning. Kaumaram acaret prajna -- In the Srimad-Bhagavatam, Prahlada Maharaja has instructed that spiritual consciousness or Krishna Consciousness should be taught to the children from the very beginning as they are given education from early childhood.

1976 Correspondence

Neither the sannyasis or brahmacaris can be expected to support Gurukula. The parents must take responsibility for their children, otherwise they should not have children. It is the duty of the individual parents

Letter to Jayatirtha -- Mayapur 22 January, 1976: You have suggested that some men are best engaged in doing business. I agree. All grhasthas who are interested in doing business should do so in full swing. Yat karosi yad asnasi, yaj juhosi dadasi yat/ yat tapasyasi kaunteya tat kurusvamad arpanam [Bg. 9.27]. Let this be the guiding principle. So let all the grhasthas who wish to, execute business full-fledgedly in the USA and in this way support Gurukula. Business must be done by the grhasthas, not by the sannyasis or brahmacaris. Neither the sannyasis or brahmacaris can be expected to support Gurukula. The parents must take responsibility for their children, otherwise they should not have children. It is the duty of the individual parents. I am not in favor of taxing the Temples. The parents must pay for the maintenance of their children. Neither can the BBT be expected to give any loans. Now the BBT 50% for construction is pledged to the projects in India -- Bombay, Kuruksetra, Mayapur. The profits from the businesses should first go to support Gurukula and balance may be given for the local Temple's maintenance. Grhasthas can do business. It is best if the Temple Presidents are either sannyasis or brahmacaris. If the grhasthas want to do book distribution, they should be given a commission of 5 to 10% of which part must go to Gurukula. For any others who are engaged in important Society projects, they must get something for maintaining their children at Gurukula. So far as Prasadam and residence, they are already getting that free. But sometimes, grhasthas make their own arrangement for cooking. For that we can give no expenditure. Just try to improve the Prasadam system so nicely that one will not want any other arrangement. Another thing, is that the grhasthas may be encouraged to do agriculture. In the Indian villages like in Vrindaban, they get enough ghee for their personal use, and sufficient excess to be sold to the merchants, who then also get some money. Cow protection means good food and good trade. So I can give you suggestions how to manage everything, but it is up to the GBC to practically execute all these points.

1974 Conversations and Morning Walks

Just like child. He wastes time in so many ways. It is the duty of the parents, guardians, to cr..., synchronize his activities so that he may not waste his time

Morning Walk -- January 5, 1974, Los Angeles: This is the difficulty. Na te viduh svartha-gatim hi visnum [SB 7.5.31]. Because they are rascal, they do not know how to utilize time, what is the aim of life, where you have to go. These things they don't know. So they must waste time. So it is the... Just like child. He wastes time in so many ways. It is the duty of the parents, guardians, to cr..., synchronize his activities so that he may not waste his time. It is the duty of the guardians. Similarly these rascals, they're wasting time. You have to engage them in Krsna consciousness. Then their time will be utilized. [break]

A child does not want to go to school, but it is the duty of the parent to send him to the school by some way or other

Morning Walk -- March 12, 1974, Vrndavana: A child does not want to go to school, but it is the duty of the parent to send him to the school by some way or other. So that is government's duty, that a man should be employed according to his capacity. There should be no unemployment. That is very dangerous position of the society. Now this unemployment question is very strong all over the world. They'll plan that "This government is not good. That system is not good. He's not good." And he'll do nothing. He'll personally do nothing. Just like the hippies, they criticize everyone, but he'll not do anything. It is all... These descriptions are there in the Srimad-Bhagavatam. We are going too far? Employed... [break] ...from the government to utilize this land. You see? So much. Everywhere you'll find. Everywhere you'll find. Who was with me in London?

1976 Conversations and Morning Walks

The child also feels pleasure with something. But it is the duty of the parent to train him to the right point of view

Evening Darsana -- August 9, 1976, Tehran: Pleasure... So that is child. The child also feels pleasure with something. But it is the duty of the parent to train him to the right point of view. The child takes pleasure playing the whole day. But the father does not allow him. If you leave, let the child seeks his own pleasure, then you are spoiling him. Then there is no need of becoming your father, guardian, let him be spoiled by his whimsical pleasure. There is no need of training, schooling, colleges. There is no need. In my childhood I was not willing to go to the schools. My mother forced, by force she used to... My father was lenient and my mother kept a special man, yamadhara(?), that, "Your duty is to take him by force to the school." Yes. My father, my mother would complain that "Your boy did not go to school." "Oh, he did not go to school?" And I was sure he was very affectionate. "Why?" "No, I shall go tomorrow." Then father, "All right, he will go tomorrow, that's all right." But that tomorrow will never come. This is my practical. My mother forced me. So I thought, "It is pleasure. Why shall I go to school? Let me play whole day." But it is the duty of the guardian to see that this is not pleasure, this is spoiling. A child may think something pleasure, but the guardian should not think that this is pleasure. This is spoiling him. Otherwise why the guardians are required? Why government is needed, why king is needed, why father is needed, why guru is needed? Just to guide. Therefore whatever you think whimsically it is pleasure, the guru, the father, the king, the government, they should guide -- "No, it is not pleasure, it is ruining. You should take like this." If the guru and father and the government, they are themselves rascals and fools, how they will guide? And that is the position. General public, they require guidance, but the guides themselves are rascals and fools, cheaters, bluffers. Therefore the condition, social condition... (passerby says something) He said in English?

1977 Conversations and Morning Walks

They do not know the aim of life. Therefore apaśyatām ātma-tattvam [SB 2.1.2]. Cannot see what is the aim of life. Therefore it is the duty of the parents. That is advised by Prahlāda Mahārāja

Morning Walk -- January 8, 1977, Bombay: Mudho nabhijanati mam ebhyah param... They do not know the aim of life. Therefore apasyatam atma-tattvam [SB 2.1.2]. Cannot see what is the aim of life. Therefore it is the duty of the parents. That is advised by Prahlada Maharaja. Kaumara acaret prajno dharman: [SB 7.6.1] "From the very beginning of life they should be taught about this Bhagavata-dharma." That is brahmacari. Brahmacari, train him to be self-controlled... If I ask you, "Give me your sons. We shall teach him how to become self-controlled," you'll laugh. Because you know, "What will be the benefit by becoming self-controlled? There is struggle for existence. He has to earn money, maintain himself." I have got this experience.