Conjugal love is divided into two categories-svakiya and parakiya

Expressions researched:
"Conjugal love" |svakiya |parakiya |"One is svakiya, and the other is parakiya"

SB Canto 1

Two classes of devotees of the Lord are mentioned in the stage of conjugal love. One is svakīya, and the other is parakīya.

SB 1.10.28, Translation and Purport: O friends, just think of His wives, whose hands He has accepted. How they must have undergone vows, baths, fire sacrifices and perfect worship of the Lord of the universe to constantly relish now the nectar from His lips [by kissing]. The damsels of Vrajabhūmi would often faint just by expecting such favors. Religious rites prescribed in the scriptures are meant to purify the mundane qualities of the conditioned souls to enable them to be gradually promoted to the stage of rendering transcendental service unto the Supreme Lord. Attainment of this stage of pure spiritual life is the highest perfection, and this stage is called svarūpa, or the factual identity of the living being. Liberation means renovation of this stage of svarūpa. In that perfect stage of svarūpa, the living being is established in five phases of loving service, one of which is the stage of mādhurya-rasa, or the humor of conjugal love. The Lord is always perfect in Himself, and thus He has no hankering for Himself. He, however, becomes a master, a friend, a son or a husband to fulfill the intense love of the devotee concerned. Herein two classes of devotees of the Lord are mentioned in the stage of conjugal love. One is svakīya, and the other is parakīya. Both of them are in conjugal love with the Personality of Godhead Kṛṣṇa. The queens at Dvārakā were svakīya, or duly married wives, but the damsels of Vraja were young friends of the Lord while He was unmarried. The Lord stayed at Vṛndāvana till the age of sixteen, and His friendly relations with the neighboring girls were in terms of parakīya. These girls, as well as the queens, underwent severe penances by taking vows, bathing and offering sacrifices in the fire, as prescribed in the scriptures. The rites, as they are, are not an end in themselves, nor are fruitive action, culture of knowledge or perfection in mystic powers ends in themselves. They are all means to attain to the highest stage of svarūpa, to render constitutional transcendental service to the Lord. Each and every living being has his individual position in one of the above-mentioned five different kinds of reciprocating means with the Lord, and in one's pure spiritual form of svarūpa the relation becomes manifest without mundane affinity. The kissing of the Lord, either by His wives or His young girl friends who aspired to have the Lord as their fiance, is not of any mundane perverted quality. Had such things been mundane, a liberated soul like Śukadeva would not have taken the trouble to relish them, nor would Lord Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu have been inclined to participate in those subjects after renouncing worldly life. The stage is earned after many lives of penance.

CC Adi-lila

CC Adi 4.45, Translation: “Increasing love is experienced in various tastes, one above another. But that love which has the highest taste in the gradual succession of desire manifests itself in the form of conjugal love.”

CC Adi 4.46, Translation: Therefore I call it madhura-rasa. It has two further divisions, namely wedded and unwedded love.

CC Adi 4.47, Translation: There is a great increase of mellow in the unwedded conjugal mood. Such love is found nowhere but in Vraja.

CC Adi 4.48, Translation: This mood is unbounded in the damsels of Vraja, but among them it finds its perfection in Śrī Rādhā.

CC Adi 4.49, Translation: Her pure, mature love surpasses that of all others. Her love is the cause of Lord Kṛṣṇa’s tasting the sweetness of the conjugal relationship.

Svakīya is the relationship with Kṛṣṇa as a formally married husband, and parakīya is the relationship with Kṛṣṇa as a paramour.

CC Adi 4.50, Translation and Purport: Therefore Lord Gaurāṅga, who is Śrī Hari Himself, accepted the sentiments of Rādhā and thus fulfilled His own desires.

Of the four kinds of reciprocation of loving service—dāsya, sakhya, vātsalya and mādhurya—mādhurya is considered the fullest. But the conjugal relationship is further divided into two varieties, namely svakīya and parakīya. Svakīya is the relationship with Kṛṣṇa as a formally married husband, and parakīya is the relationship with Kṛṣṇa as a paramour. Expert analysts have decided that the transcendental ecstasy of the parakīya mellow is better because it is more enthusiastic. This phase of conjugal love is found in those who have surrendered to the Lord in intense love, knowing well that such illicit love with a paramour is not morally approved in society. The risks involved in such love of Godhead make this emotion superior to the relationship in which such risk is not involved. The validity of such risk, however, is possible only in the transcendental realm. Svakīya and parakīya conjugal love of Godhead have no existence in the material world, and parakīya is not exhibited anywhere in Vaikuṇṭha, but only in the portion of Goloka Vṛndāvana known as Vraja.

Some devotees think that Kṛṣṇa is eternally the enjoyer in Goloka Vṛndāvana but only sometimes comes to the platform of Vraja to enjoy parakīya-rasa. The six Gosvāmīs of Vṛndāvana, however, have explained that Kṛṣṇa’s pastimes in Vraja are eternal, like His other activities in Goloka Vṛndāvana. Vraja is a confidential part of Goloka Vṛndāvana. Kṛṣṇa exhibited His Vraja pastimes on the surface of this world, and similar pastimes are eternally exhibited in Vraja in Goloka Vṛndāvana, where parakīya-rasa is ever existent.

CC Madhya-lila

The Lord enjoys Himself in two ways, known as svakīya and parakīya.

CC Madhya 13.24, Translation and Purport: Having taken permission from the goddess of fortune, the Lord came out to ride on the Ratha car and perform His pastimes for the pleasure of the devotees.

In this connection, Śrīla Bhaktisiddhānta Sarasvatī Ṭhākura comments that as an ideal husband, Lord Jagannātha remained fifteen days in a secluded place with His wife, the supreme goddess of fortune. Nonetheless, the Lord wanted to come out of seclusion to give happiness to His devotees. The Lord enjoys Himself in two ways, known as svakīya and parakīya. The Lord’s conjugal love in the svakīya-rasa relates to the regulative principles observed in Dvārakā, where the Lord has many married queens. But in Vṛndāvana the conjugal love of the Lord is not with His married wives but with His girlfriends, the gopīs. Conjugal love with the gopīs is called parakīya-rasa. Lord Jagannātha leaves the secluded place where He enjoys the company of the supreme goddess of fortune in svakīya-rasa, and He goes to Vṛndāvana, where He enjoys the parakīya-rasa. Bhaktisiddhānta Sarasvatī Ṭhākura therefore reminds us that the Lord’s pleasure in parakīya-rasa is superior to His pleasure in svakīya-rasa.

In the material world, parakīya-rasa, or loving affairs with unmarried girlfriends, is the most degraded relationship, but in the spiritual world this type of loving affair is considered the supreme enjoyment. In the material world everything is but a reflection of the spiritual world, and that reflection is perverted. We cannot understand the affairs of the spiritual world on the basis of our experience in the material world. The Lord’s pastimes with the gopīs are therefore misunderstood by mundane scholars and word-wranglers. The parakīya-rasa of the spiritual world should not be discussed except by one who is very advanced in pure devotional service. The parakīya-rasa in the spiritual world and that in the material world are not comparable. The former is like gold, and the latter is like iron. Because the difference between the two is so great, they cannot actually be compared. However, just as a knowledgeable person can easily distinguish gold from iron, one who has the proper realization can easily distinguish the transcendental activities of the spiritual world from material activities.

Conjugal love is divided into two categories-svakīya and parakīya.

CC Madhya 23, Purport: The following summary of the Twenty-third Chapter is given by Śrīla Bhaktivinoda Ṭhākura in his Amṛta-pravāha-bhāṣya. In this chapter Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu describes the symptoms of emotion and love and the awakening of one’s original loving relationship with the Lord, as well as the characteristics of a devotee who has actually attained that stage. He then describes the gradual increase of love of God up to the point of mahābhāva. He then describes the five divisions of attraction and how they continue. He also describes the mellow derived from conjugal love, which is the supreme emotion. Conjugal love is divided into two categories-svakīya and parakīya. Svakīya refers to loving affairs between husband and wife, and parakīya refers to loving affairs between two lovers.